If you were NMMNG or kind of like that, what did your spouse do

when you tried to change? You can search my old threads but the past years of husband's behaviors of trying to placate me and tell me what I wanted to hear have all come back to hurt us like I said they would... I'm trying on my part to BE open ears, non reactive, just listening so he can communicate with me... Husband said he will go to IC about communicating. Lot of how he was raised led him to be like this but I need HONESTY. I need NO lying about anything, friendships with co-workers or anything in the slight, I'd rather KNOW about instead of finding out on my own. So in the meantime, what do I do? I'm worried because he tells me things like "I know myself, I would never hurt you or cheat on you or anything like that". I told him that a married couple shouldn't have opposite sex friends as their MAIN support, and that having loose or very open boundaries is a recipe for disaster. He thinks he would never do anything and doesn't see it like me, he thinks I see it differently because I was cheated on by others in the past (true) but I still think not having strong boundaries and having friendships with the opposite sex as a main friend (because he doesn't have other friends and he mostly works with females) is a potential for disaster. Any advice?

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