Ive been married for 16 years, 3 children and an up and down marriage. We go great for awhile then things go down hill, well I was away for 7 months working, she would send letters stating she misses me, loves me and cant wait till Im home because she feels safer and more secure when Im home.
I come home on November 4th and things didnt seem right, I saw her infatuated on facebook and when I did my digging found she was having an emotional affair. I brought that to her attention that I was aware of this, we discussed it and I moved past it, we seemed to have resolved our issues with that.
Weeks go by, I love you texts sent, I sent her a dozen roses with one fake one with a note, "I will love you until the last rose dies." At night I would tell her I dont want to lose her and she assured me I wouldnt.
Suddenly last Friday night she said it, I love you but Im not in love with you. I was shocked, I thought, "why in the hell did you lead me on? She said it isnt sudden, she wants her independence, her identity back etc...
So we begin to talk and I have noticed how there has been NO affection to me and our children, our children have come to me this week and said that mom doesnt hug them, doesnt say I love you. She sleeps a ridiculous amount of time, one minute shes wide awake and the next shes out cold.
No interest in much but TV and movies. Just dead to everyone. So we begin to research her feelings and how we can fix this, we started yesterday to keep a journal, open up about everything and made a commitment to fix this, her emphasizing TRY!
It feels like she just wants to be friends, like we are going to put all this work into this for the outcome to be friends and there I have wasted a year or years rebuilding this.
I am at a loss, I dont know what to do and we are not going to try counseling, too many horror stories. One hour a week isnt going to do nothing but bring up past anger.
Have you been here? Can you give me some real world advice and not text book knowledge please?
I come home on November 4th and things didnt seem right, I saw her infatuated on facebook and when I did my digging found she was having an emotional affair. I brought that to her attention that I was aware of this, we discussed it and I moved past it, we seemed to have resolved our issues with that.
Weeks go by, I love you texts sent, I sent her a dozen roses with one fake one with a note, "I will love you until the last rose dies." At night I would tell her I dont want to lose her and she assured me I wouldnt.
Suddenly last Friday night she said it, I love you but Im not in love with you. I was shocked, I thought, "why in the hell did you lead me on? She said it isnt sudden, she wants her independence, her identity back etc...
So we begin to talk and I have noticed how there has been NO affection to me and our children, our children have come to me this week and said that mom doesnt hug them, doesnt say I love you. She sleeps a ridiculous amount of time, one minute shes wide awake and the next shes out cold.
No interest in much but TV and movies. Just dead to everyone. So we begin to research her feelings and how we can fix this, we started yesterday to keep a journal, open up about everything and made a commitment to fix this, her emphasizing TRY!
It feels like she just wants to be friends, like we are going to put all this work into this for the outcome to be friends and there I have wasted a year or years rebuilding this.
I am at a loss, I dont know what to do and we are not going to try counseling, too many horror stories. One hour a week isnt going to do nothing but bring up past anger.
Have you been here? Can you give me some real world advice and not text book knowledge please?
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