So this is just a mess and I really would like some advice and a few objective opinions.
So a few months ago, I got together with this girl (we'll call her A) at my school, who I got on very well with and became fairly close to in a few weeks (this was also my first relationship, which is why I'm such as idiot).
Anyway, a mutual friend of ours (we'll call him B) tells me the day after we get together that he and I are no longer friends, because he liked A ( weirdly enough, his insistence that she tell me she had a crush on me was the catalyst for our relationship).
So we dated until mid January, at which point she became distant, and extremely temperamental with me, so she broke up with me a few days later. So for the next two weeks, I kept my distance from her, and B, being the shameless SOB he is, spent more time with her than before.
Earlier this month, she texted me out of the blue asking whether I thought B was the reason she broke up with me. Now, with the imperfect information I had, I said yes. She told me that she never had, nor would ever date B, and that the real reason was because she was too insecure and because I was too affectionate, she felt she couldn't cope. She asked for another chance, and I, in all my naivety and stupidity, agreed.
The second time round was even worse, she was awkward and completely distant, refusing to even let me kiss her (another warning sign that I ignored). So we broke up again, because with that and the little amount of time we could spend together meant we couldn't salvage it. She asked to be friends, and I said yes, because I don't really like cutting ties because of my own insecurities (which could take up another 500 words, so I won't go into that).
Anyway, the next day, she completely ignores me, even though I'm trying to be friendly and make things normal.
During this time, B and I start speaking to each other again, and I ask him if he still likes her, which he admits, but he also says that if I'm not okay with it, he won't do anything, and I tell him so.
She asks for space, and I get angry and tell her that I'm done going out of my comfort zone and humiliating myself for her. Half term arrives and throughout that week, she and I play PS4 with a few other friends, and I'm subtly expressing my anger every now and again, at which point, I felt was fair.
So, I apologise for my behaviour at the end of the week, and ask to meet her this week to talk. She agrees. She kept putting it off, and on Tuesday, I find out from a close friend that she's seeing someone else (not that I care, she's my ex). I press her to talk, because I want to know why she wanted a second chance, and why she'd kept ignoring me when in comparison, I'd not done much bad. She continues to evade, and then when I tell her that if she's going to ignore me, she could at least have the decency to say it to my face instead of acting like I'd killed her dog, to which she just goes "Okay".
I text her, saying that all I want is closure as to where I went wrong so I don't do it to the next girl, and that she could stop being so bitchy about it and tell me straight that she doesn't want to instead of acting immaturely, so she takes two hours to tell me that she is going to ignore me, that she's not worth the effort and that I should do the same.
I then get a text from B, telling me that if I want closure, I have to talk to both of them, (I wasn't even surprised by that point, but I figure they'd been dating since Valentine's day, roughly two days after I told him I wasn't cool with it)
Now, I'm cutting contact with both of them for betraying me like this, for lying to me and treating me like I'm nothing to them. However, I feel really upset and humiliated about this, and I just want to know whether what I've done is wrong and any help to stop myself dwelling on it, considering the three of us share a large circle of mutual friends whom I also want to distance myself from now as some didn't tell me they were lying to me, and others because I'm afraid they would take their side and leave me even worse for wear with all my issues.
Sorry for the long read, but any advice would be appreciated, even if it's a couple of words.
Highlights:
-Ex and I date for a few months
-Friend tells me he likes her after I get with her
-We break up because she's insecure
-I stupidly give her a second chance
-We break up again, she wants to be friends, but ignores me
-I lose my patience and act kinda hostile to her in half term
-I ask to talk, she puts it off, starts seeing my ex-friend who told me he wouldn't try anything until I was okay with it
-She tells me she's ignoring me, I find out they're together, I choose to remove them from my life because I think even I deserve better
-I feel like crap right now.
Put the internet to work for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment