Ok I had this thread up before but there were a couple of people who had nothing but negative things to say, not talking about anyone i replied to. I did not join this site to read negative responses and insults about my wife. I realize she screwed up and i did not cause the affair. At first I did partially blame myself for not being there for her emotionally but she made the choice to cheat.
I'm going to give this one more chance and if the trolls show up then the site is not for me.
Here's the story made short. My wife of 29 years, who I STILL love had an two week affair with a married man from out of state. I just had a feeling something was going on so I confronted her about it and she denied it. After about 30 minutes she asked if I would still love her if she did have an affair, well that answered my question. Whats strange is i wasn't mad, or at least I was able to keep that old me under control and not show I wanted to kill the man.
We talked and I gave her the choice me or the other man but I could not share her. She could not make her mind up because she said they were in love. To wrap it up I gave her a choice, either give him up completely and try to save our damaged marriage or a divorce was the only choice, and i came very close to filing for divorce, and there's no promise i still won't file because the papers are ready.
She finally gave me the OM's name and with a couple of hours of research online I found all the info I needed on him and his entire family. I contacted his wife and let her in on the affair, which she knew nothing about. When she confronted him he lied about ever knowing my wife, this is the man that said he was in love with her, and even lied by saying his friend used his ID to pick up women. The OM's wife called and wanted me to describe her husband so my wife, who was sitting right there described him, Blonde hair and blue eyes. Well this along with the other proof i gave her convinced her that it was her husband.
My wife says she wants to save our marriage and of course I want to but who knows right now. I'm not saying we will make it but i know we could if she try's, which means not messing with other men and not looking at me the way she used to see me.
I was under the impression this was a support site and some have provided support. But then there's the ones who want to see it fail. Maybe they are right but insulting me and my wife is not the people way to express themselves. Right now I am dealing with a lot of pain and hurt and the last thing i need to hear is my wife being called names and me being called ignorant or stupid. Is repairing a marriage after this easy? NO! Is it possible? YES! If you want to help tell me how to get the thought of her laying with another man naked out of my mind. Tell me how to not think about her spending an entire night with the OM when she lied and told me she was spending the night with a friend. Tell me how to forget that she answered a text saying she lost track of time because her and her friend were talking when actually she was having sex with the OM! Tell me how to forget that she was answering my text and said i love and miss you while she was laying next to him!!!
Some of you will say i am a fool for forgiving her but when you have loved a woman for over half your life and she is the only woman you have ever been with you have enough love to do that! I have forgiven her but I have not forgotten what she and the OM did to me.
Now if you want to help then reply. If you want to be an A-hole hidding behind a key board stay off this thread.
I'm going to give this one more chance and if the trolls show up then the site is not for me.
Here's the story made short. My wife of 29 years, who I STILL love had an two week affair with a married man from out of state. I just had a feeling something was going on so I confronted her about it and she denied it. After about 30 minutes she asked if I would still love her if she did have an affair, well that answered my question. Whats strange is i wasn't mad, or at least I was able to keep that old me under control and not show I wanted to kill the man.
We talked and I gave her the choice me or the other man but I could not share her. She could not make her mind up because she said they were in love. To wrap it up I gave her a choice, either give him up completely and try to save our damaged marriage or a divorce was the only choice, and i came very close to filing for divorce, and there's no promise i still won't file because the papers are ready.
She finally gave me the OM's name and with a couple of hours of research online I found all the info I needed on him and his entire family. I contacted his wife and let her in on the affair, which she knew nothing about. When she confronted him he lied about ever knowing my wife, this is the man that said he was in love with her, and even lied by saying his friend used his ID to pick up women. The OM's wife called and wanted me to describe her husband so my wife, who was sitting right there described him, Blonde hair and blue eyes. Well this along with the other proof i gave her convinced her that it was her husband.
My wife says she wants to save our marriage and of course I want to but who knows right now. I'm not saying we will make it but i know we could if she try's, which means not messing with other men and not looking at me the way she used to see me.
I was under the impression this was a support site and some have provided support. But then there's the ones who want to see it fail. Maybe they are right but insulting me and my wife is not the people way to express themselves. Right now I am dealing with a lot of pain and hurt and the last thing i need to hear is my wife being called names and me being called ignorant or stupid. Is repairing a marriage after this easy? NO! Is it possible? YES! If you want to help tell me how to get the thought of her laying with another man naked out of my mind. Tell me how to not think about her spending an entire night with the OM when she lied and told me she was spending the night with a friend. Tell me how to forget that she answered a text saying she lost track of time because her and her friend were talking when actually she was having sex with the OM! Tell me how to forget that she was answering my text and said i love and miss you while she was laying next to him!!!
Some of you will say i am a fool for forgiving her but when you have loved a woman for over half your life and she is the only woman you have ever been with you have enough love to do that! I have forgiven her but I have not forgotten what she and the OM did to me.
Now if you want to help then reply. If you want to be an A-hole hidding behind a key board stay off this thread.
Put the internet to work for you.
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