My wife and I have been married for 7 years. I am 35 and she is 31. We have a 5 year old son and a 3 years old daughter. When our son was two years old, she had an affair with a construction worker, they did not go physical. I find out about it and forgave her about that affair. One year later, I had two work in an different city from my family and only be home for a week for every two weeks, that was when she began to start this relationship with her high school friend, ( I did not find about this until recently when I got into her email account). I am sure that they went physical from the email they sent between them. This "friend" of her lives in a different city, and she mentioned him to me, but during the whole time, she keep saying that their friendship is pure friendship.about one year ago, I got transferred back be with my family about one year ago. Last month, this friend of hers visited us, during his visit, I noticed that their relationship is beyond friendship, so I interfered. After that she said their relationship was over because obvious that this guy only want to have sex with her. This guy stop sending her email. I keep monitor her email and find out that her keeps email this guy saying I still love you and such. When I asked her if she still in touch with this person she says no.
I feel cheated and do not think that I can trust her anymore, I want to end our marriage but I am afraid that our divorce will hurt our children too badly. At this stage, I stay married to her only because of our children sake.
What shall I do? Shall I let her know that I know everything about her and her friend? I am thinking about pretend that I do not know everything and just let it be until our children are 18, meanwhile keep collecting evidence, and divorce her once our children are 18. And let our children know the reason of divorce. But there are still 15 more years to go, that seems to be a long time to live like this. Another option is to expose her and divorce now, but this will hurt our children badly, especially at this young age. I can also confront her now and hope she can change, but what is the chance that she will change? She might just hide her affair better.
What shall I do?
I feel cheated and do not think that I can trust her anymore, I want to end our marriage but I am afraid that our divorce will hurt our children too badly. At this stage, I stay married to her only because of our children sake.
What shall I do? Shall I let her know that I know everything about her and her friend? I am thinking about pretend that I do not know everything and just let it be until our children are 18, meanwhile keep collecting evidence, and divorce her once our children are 18. And let our children know the reason of divorce. But there are still 15 more years to go, that seems to be a long time to live like this. Another option is to expose her and divorce now, but this will hurt our children badly, especially at this young age. I can also confront her now and hope she can change, but what is the chance that she will change? She might just hide her affair better.
What shall I do?
Put the internet to work for you.
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