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Women of TSR: A guide to men and confidence

Yes... I thought I'd write the part 2, as it's only fair to men as it takes two to form a relationship, therefore the man isn't just the only one to blame. There was a thread aimed at men so here is one aimed at women. I know it's all opinion, so I'm open to criticism lol

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1) Give him a chance! Men are a diverse group of people who you can't judge in one second


Believe it or not men don't have all the same personalities! There are men with a more reserved personality and there are men who are more extroverted.
You will meet men who like football, men who don't like football, but like F1 and even men who don't like sport but like comic books and photography even more! Some guys even like rock-climbing, martial arts, gardening and even fashion! You're even going to meet men who are closet Bronies! We definitely don't have the same set of beliefs or hobbies. We aren't all the same. You have no idea what men are thinking.


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2) Take action and stop waiting for him to come to you. Say something.


We're in 2014. Times have changed. We live in the age of the internet and society moves faster. The old belief that 'men initiate and women respond' isn't compatible with today. To keep this short and to the point: if you don't take action and say something then you will miss put on a lot of things in life. Us guys are expected to read hints and signs of interest. You can't just rely on these. There's nothing wrong with saying what 'you' want! Be confident! Don't be scared! He can either say yes or no.


Also make some effort. Don't just leave the guy to lead and expect him to do all the work. An example being: So many women also on dating sites just state: 'if you wanna know anything ask me'. That's just lazy. These women don't deserve men to approach them. Effort should be on both sides. The guy will just give up and move on. Some guys like a challenge though (Pepe Le Pew types who love the chase).


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3) Stop believing that love is like a Disney movie. Don't hold onto the image of your ideal man.


So many women I meet want fireworks and for the dating process to be like they see in movies, music videos or read in books. They want someone as exciting and as adventurous as they see if films. They are chasing and looking for a man who doesn't exist. The perfect man only exists in Disney movies. Every girl wants an Aladdin - A perky accessible guy, with a loving, but a rugged bad-boy side who drags you into different worlds and into a fun adventure, getting you in trouble, but he always gets you out and you'll always get home in one piece and live happily ever after. That guy doesn't exist.
What the movies and books don't tell you is that there are a lot of sh*tty people in this world no matter what they look like, and finding just one person you genuinely like and get along with isn't a common feat.
The problem with men and women is that we are always after something better. The danger of looking for an image of an ideal man is that you miss chances. You are just focussing on your target and nothing else. You could have been with someone who you genuinely like spending time with, who inspired you, respected you and made you smile. If you are so consumed by the pursuit of the ideal man, you don't appreciate what some the men you come across are offering. When you meet do meet men who look as you want and appear to have the personality and life you want, you have little in common with them and are incompatible with you. Be open and give people a chance (providing they aren't rude dickheads)


This brings me onto:


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4) Stop the feeling of entitlement


Women have better support networks than men do, but this can sometimes backfire on women. Some people just aren't honest. You need to be honest with yourself when evaluating your bad points and attempt to improve on them. Women in my experience will often try to be best friends to each other and emphasise the solution of 'waiting', backed up with the statement of 'You deserve this, you're so great! You're such a good catch! Any man would be lucky!' Many women use the Marilyn quote:


"I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control, and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best."


To be fair why the hell should any decent man have to put up with your ****? I feel like girls are using it as an excuse to be bitches. Sure, we all have our flaws. I don't believe you should beat yourself up over those flaws. I don't believe your man should beat you up over those flaws (literally and figuratively). But I also believe you don't get to go around acting like an inconsiderate jerk all the time and expect men to just deal with it because as far as you're concerned, they're lucky just to be with you. What if guys behaved like this? Sometimes they do, and you're either a fool for staying or you kick them to the curb. Everyone knows that. Dude has every right to give you get you out of his life if you can't keep your not so endearing qualities under control.

I can also argue that Marilyn Monroe was a bad role model, but that's another topic.


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