Some of you know my situation so I will spare the full re-cap. Anyway, I have come to find out that the people that moved her out actually work for the man she is leaving me for and that they moved her right in to his place. If you recall, when we had our "talk" just three weeks ago Sunday, she said we simply didn't fit and that we weren't compatible. She claimed she didn't cheat and that it's not about anyone else. They all say that.
Now I know, that they have been sneaking around - at least emotionally - since before we even got married, which is when she first started to detach. Crazy. This (and of course her new/old man) is why she has been able to be so cold and resolute. But, why did she go through with the wedding???? For those of you who don't know, we were married just two months. She is a severe alcoholic and narcissist and this man is her ex who is also severely alcoholic and a local bar "celebrity" of sorts. He has been putting the full court press on her since just after we got engaged (she actually asked me to marry her!). They will be living the party life and then some. I'm quite certain he promised to marry her or she wouldn't have had the courage to leave.
Remember, we had our "talk" agreeing to divorce three weeks ago Sunday, she was out that Tuesday, and she has been in a semi-rush for getting the divorce finalized now. I'm guessing that he promised to marry her and she - knowing what a cheater this guy is - wants to get a ring on it fast. I think she also thinks it will make her look like less of a tramp supposedly to be able to say she's divorced (even though it's just the paper signing) and be seen out with this guy.
Lastly, her Mom called and is totally devastated still. She wanted me to know that her whole family still loves me. I told her some information about this other guy, but kept it very general. Unfortunately, that conversation with her Mom, set me back a bit in the grieving process.
I'm still struggling to put this behind me. It's been almost three weeks since we had the talk, and I still catch myself trying to figure out the details and obsessing over it. I do think I'm getting better overall, but I'm tired of feeling blue. The betrayal, the lying, the cheating, and the way it all went down really stings. I also think about those times when she wasn't drinking as much or hanging out at those bars and it was really cool. Sad she will never be able to live as that person - if she could she wouldn't throw away our marriage to get back with a lying, cheating, alcoholic.
I guess what so many here have said is true - I dodged a bullet. The thing is, I am still grieving pretty hard.
Now I know, that they have been sneaking around - at least emotionally - since before we even got married, which is when she first started to detach. Crazy. This (and of course her new/old man) is why she has been able to be so cold and resolute. But, why did she go through with the wedding???? For those of you who don't know, we were married just two months. She is a severe alcoholic and narcissist and this man is her ex who is also severely alcoholic and a local bar "celebrity" of sorts. He has been putting the full court press on her since just after we got engaged (she actually asked me to marry her!). They will be living the party life and then some. I'm quite certain he promised to marry her or she wouldn't have had the courage to leave.
Remember, we had our "talk" agreeing to divorce three weeks ago Sunday, she was out that Tuesday, and she has been in a semi-rush for getting the divorce finalized now. I'm guessing that he promised to marry her and she - knowing what a cheater this guy is - wants to get a ring on it fast. I think she also thinks it will make her look like less of a tramp supposedly to be able to say she's divorced (even though it's just the paper signing) and be seen out with this guy.
Lastly, her Mom called and is totally devastated still. She wanted me to know that her whole family still loves me. I told her some information about this other guy, but kept it very general. Unfortunately, that conversation with her Mom, set me back a bit in the grieving process.
I'm still struggling to put this behind me. It's been almost three weeks since we had the talk, and I still catch myself trying to figure out the details and obsessing over it. I do think I'm getting better overall, but I'm tired of feeling blue. The betrayal, the lying, the cheating, and the way it all went down really stings. I also think about those times when she wasn't drinking as much or hanging out at those bars and it was really cool. Sad she will never be able to live as that person - if she could she wouldn't throw away our marriage to get back with a lying, cheating, alcoholic.
I guess what so many here have said is true - I dodged a bullet. The thing is, I am still grieving pretty hard.
Put the internet to work for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment