Didn't take the bait this time!

So earlier this evening after my wife and I get back home I go and take out the trash and forget to close the back door, which in return allows one of our cats to get out for about 10 seconds and also lets in a harmless moth. Well my wife being the dramatic person that she is GOES OFF on me about it and starts shouting and swearing at me, and normally I would then return fire with a few insults and get even louder......but not tonight. Instead I took a deeeep breath and calmly went into the bedroom and slowly closed the door and locked it(while she was still screaming at me), and I simply put on the hockey game and relaxed on the bed for about 15 minutes to let her calm her azz down. And it seemed to work because she was a lot calmer when I came out and then never said another word about the door all night. :D

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SuperBowl Sunday!

I don't really have a favorite in this one but I am placing a small wager on the 49ers and picking them by the score of 24-20; and we are having a large family gathering for the game that we normally do every year so it should be a good time! So who does everyone else have and where will you be watching it?

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What's it like

I am still looking for help. I am a 58 year old Asperger and I have been married for 38 years. During our marriage she has had at least one EA/PA and during our separations she had had sex with at least seven others. Our marriage has been sexless for 24 years. I am not happy that all of this has happened but it doesn't really bother me, except that I can get very angry and depressed because of our lack of intimacy. Since my diagnosis my life has started to work, I have lost wieght, rebuilt much of my health and would like to have sex, but I'm sort of lost. What does it feel like to be in love, to want some one and to be wanted back? How do I love someone when for most emotions the best I can do is mimic them? My wife is not giving me "red flags", her phone and computer are open to me and I know where she is and who she is with at all times (as she knows me) so I know she isn't cheating. I can't because of who I am. I have a limited grasp on these emotions, but would like to feel at least some of them. Can anyone tell me?

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Help..I'm so sad.

My husband is cruel. He was not always like this. He used to be the sweetest man in the world, he treated me better than anyone ever did. Now he treats me worse than anyone ever has. I just got married in November. He hurts me and never apologizes. He says hurtful things. He cares nothing of my feelings. He refuses to comfort me when I cry. He threatens my life. I'm scared and sad. I don't know who to talk to or what to do.... I feel alone..I don't know what I expect of this but, I feel I am going to explode.

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GUYS: what are you thinking when eyeing a girl?

Anon because people know me on here. What is going through your head when you're staring/glancing/eyeing at a girl you think is attractive? This guy in college whom I dont know (but always see around) keeps doing all three whenever he sees me which makes me feel very awkward. My friend said all guys think about when they look at a girl is how to "****" them. Is this true? :o If they do, that's pretty uncomforting..

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shagatuni/com

Has anyone used this site? Is it any good? Any encounters yet?

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Why Does An Older Member Of Staff Get Respected More Than Me?

Work in an off-license. I notice I get abused a lot, in the sense that people say that the beers are on offer when in fact they are not. 3 classic examples, of me being taken advantage of were... (1) A man working for a telecoms company (Hate these reps so much) came to the store to buy some beer. He then says he's going to pay with his credit card. I tell him that we don't have a credit card machine (we have never had one as there have been a lot of scammers in the area), but the person says he came last week and paid with a credit card. Not only did he lie, but he also didn't listen to me. (2) I had reps coming in from different companies trying to flog their products. They say stuff like 'your manager knows us' and 'we sell at a good price'. These people don't leave even though I tell them that I'm just a worker (3) Had some rude customer telling me off for giving him the wrong lottery ticket (for the wrong day) even though he told me to give him the ticket for his numbers. The point I'm trying to get is that I'm 20, and these people don't show any respect. However, when a older member of staff work they get treated with a lot of respect. For example, the man with the lottery problem was being so nice yesterday when my 40 year old colleague served him. Furthermore, people smile more often and converse more with the older colleagues. I'm very interested to know why I don't get respect when I'm giving others respect, whilst my other colleagues get respected.

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advice needed about this guy...

so last night i brought a guy back to my flat. he sang me to sleep which was nice (and we didn't have sex). but he broke one of my glasses and i'm really sad. what should i do? can i call the police? is this violation of property? it was a really nice glass :(

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Is my boyfriend being unreasonable or am I?

Okay, so a tiny bit of background information - I won't go into it too much detail because that isn't the issue here but essentially, I'm in a secret relationship with my ex-tutor; he quite a bit older than me and there are frequent desputes between us. His job is extremely time consuming and he very rarely has time for me - I never feel loved by him and I'm constantly the one who suggests we do something; it actually makes me feel like I'm pestering to see him. He calls me demanding which upsets me because the only reason I probably am is because he never has the time to make the effort. I text him explaining I was very unhappy and felt as though we have constant problems and he sent me a voicemail saying he doesn't have the time for this conversation. So, here's the main point: he's a teacher at a college and next week Ofsted are in for 3 days and last week, he said to me that he needs at least 2 weeks to focus - essentially meaning, I can't see him for the said period. Is he being unfair to expect me to simply consent to such a thing or am I being, well, demanding?

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Dissapointed in myself over my in-ability to attract

So as of last night i officially realised that i am hopeless as hell at pulling or attracting girls in general. Long story short, brought up in a religious household, never hit on a girl or even tried anything with a girl before uni, changed my mind over sex before marriage. Now 19 yo, i missed that time period when everyone was 16/17 and learned to pull because they were actually trying to do so. Now nearly 20 at uni and i dont have a hope in hell to get a gf or pull over my massive lack of experience and the fact that i am so nervous that i physically feel out of breath at the thought of approaching a girl. Naturally this results in me pussying out 85% of the time, and the 15% of the time that i do, i either look like a complete nervous wreck or at the very most manage to make out in those rare occasions. I dont even feel sexually frustrated, i just feel dissapointed in myself, demasculated and weak. Im dying to sort out this part of my life. PUA community looks like a lifeline, but i dont have the time or the money to get involved in that. Worst part is i know what it takes to attract or pull, but i can never get myself to just get the confidence and get over these nerves. I am a complete pussy and i find it near impossible to overcome it.

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Sex on first date, sex on call help me!!!

Hi guys I met this guy like 3 months ago on a date site, we went on a first date. We clicked had so much to talk about and even more to laugh about. Well we ended up at his and had sex(mistake number 1). I left his house the next day. Well we never spoke or text after that and he didn't reply my text anyways. 3months later in the middle of the night I get this text from a strange number an when I asked who it was he got mad for me not having his number, well he invited me over that night for a drink and tv and we split the cab fare by 50% to his house. Of course we ended up with sex. Next day,I was up dresses and ready to go. But he ask why my mood was weird to be honest I didn't have a mood, I just wanted to give him space in the morning . I sat around his for another 10minutes, then left with no kiss or hug or nothing. I felt like ******** after I left his house. This is the text I sent him before I got on the train *** Hey, just so we are clear I wasn't worried or anything. Matter of fact I thought you were a little unlike your usual self. Not sure why so I drew my own conclusions. *** Well as I know he won't reply. I have always liked this guy since from first date. Well it's like having the same feeling all over again. I feel he needs me for sex, I like him. And was wondering if I can ask him what he's doing on valentine's day. What should I do please help. Peace xx

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I don't want to face my boyfriend. Help!

Hello TSR, please help me!!! Last weekend, my boyfriend and I went to his parents' place for a family Sunday lunch and his brother was there. During the course of the visit, my boyfriend's brother: 1) said that I am inevitably going to end up sponging off my boyfriend because I'm a girl and studying English lit which in his view isn't a very worthwhile subject (my boyfriend and his brother did engineering and work in oil and gas and so already earn quite a lot) 2) asked my boyfriend if I can cook well and when he was told that I can and do, said that this was the most important reason to keep hold of me 3) said that all women are after is marriage and children and they think about it all the time. I said that was an unfair generalisation and only applies to some women so... 4) he said I was just young and naive. I am several years younger than my boyfriend and I always feel guilty about the fact that my boyfriend always pays when we go out (even though it makes sense because he can afford it and I can't), so what his brother said really hurt me: he was voicing my biggest fears about my relationship. Also, the comments about cooking and wanting to get married are insulting; we're not living in the 1950s any more! When I mentioned all this to my boyfriend, however, he defended his brother and said that it wasn't meant maliciously. So now I'm feeling bad about what his brother said and angry at him for not understanding how upset it made me. My boyfriend (I haven't seen him since last weekend as we're two hours apart) has no idea that I've been so upset and is writing me cheerful emails and wants to skype this evening. I don't know what to do! Should I pretend that everything's okay or confront him about it?

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Dating conundrums with women?

So, met a girl I knew at Uni at a science fair. Got number, invited for drink, drink turned in to an impromptu meal. Chemistry a little lacking but I was still interested and suggested cinema next time. She seemed pleased and said yes. Cinema date disaster. I was tired, yawning etc. film crap. On way out held her hand and although she accepted I could tell she tensed and so I let go. The when I offered to walk her to her car she became really edgy. I felt sad and a little hurt she didn't trust me as we had known me for a good while. Went on my way and decided to park it. Was really surprised when she called me a week later. Reason for call unclear but I assumed it meant she might still be interested. Suggested going for a walk and again she became edgy. So that was it, no further contact. I never understand women and dating. What went wrong? And why on earth did she call again? My interpretation in the end was that she was keen for a boyfriend but on reflection decided I didn't quite fit bill. I seem to get every frustrating combination of encouragement and rejection!

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Valentines day Ideas?

Right so I'm thinking of telling this girl that I like her on valentines day... I'm not sure how, she knows I like her, in fact, I was talking to a friend and she said that she's enjoying the fact I like her but hasn't made her mind up yet. So what do I do? Buy her a card or make her one, but then what would I put in it? Tell her how I feel or understate it? Do I write a cheesy poem like 'roses are red, so is the state, let's be comrades, because you are great?' Or do I just keep it short and simple? Even then what do I get her? I gave someone a giant chocolate bar so that's out of the question, do I even get her anything? Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated Posted from TSR Mobile

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ugly six packs

My ex boyfriend and most guys I know try really hard to get low body fat and this awful six pack look. Why are so many men convinced women find this awful shredded look attractive? I think it looks vain, unnatural and like an over compensation of something if you ask me. Low body fat six packs are so ugly and bumpy looking. This is not attractive: High body fat 6 packs look so much more attractive to me, like this:

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Moving to uni with my grilfriend

Dear world! I want to move to the east end on London to study at ravensbourne later this year with my girlfriend hew iv been with for 2 years now. the house prices are very high and i don't no how i will be able to afford it, is there a easier, cheaper way of doing so. Ideally i would want to stay in a student dorm but someone hew isn't studying, meaning my girlfriend cant stay there with me. What should i do!! P.S. she would prefer not to go in shared accommodation.

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Straight guy dilemma

The other night, this 20yo straight Russian guy I know somewhat (we only ever played poker as a group a lot) asked me to come round and get **** faced cause he was feeling low. So I did and then he started getting weird, I can't remember the exact order of events (**** faced) but he asked me loads of graphic questions about sex, like what I'm good at and what I like. He kept sticking his head between my legs and even bit me (I took the pic as proof his head was between my legs,don't wanna be seen as a predatory gay) he kept masturbating in front of me and saying I should too as it's so good on md. Grabbed my genitals, listed reasons he wished he was gay and listed reasons he never could be. What the hell?

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I'm a creep

I used to be a very independent guy, whom found a great sense of solitude in doing everything himself. I didn't care very much about making friends, and I sure as heck didn't care about having a girlfriend. Approximately this time last year, I feel in love with a very confused girl whom enticed me with a fake personality (she pretended to be my 'soul mate' of all things) and I was vulnerable enough to believe her at the time. It wasn't long until things ended in a very devastating manner (for me at least, she was very happy with her decision) and now I can't stand being alone. Every time I walk alone (for a long duration), eat alone, study alone (etc.) I feel very lonely/depressed. Considering that I'm pound for pound an introvert, that's very worrying to say the least. I guess I feel in love with 'being in love'. Through the fake relationship, I learned that I enjoy giving presents much, much more than I enjoy receiving them (when my heart is fully in it). I didn't use to think that I was capable of falling in love, but I did. I definitely no longer love the girl, now that I know her true colours, but the experience still affects me very negatively. Now I want a REAL girlfriend, but I don't see that happening. I'm not lacking in the looks department, but I can't seem to connect with girls, especially the girls at my university. I'm not an overtly shy guy either; I can definitely hold a good conversation with a girl if genuinely wants to talk to me. My previous attitude regarding platonic and romantic relationships stemmed out of growing up alone, so I knew nothing else (and it was like a "defense mechanism" for me, in order to help me not go completely insane). That fake relationship dissolved the oblivion that I used to be in, but in the worst way possible. I'm now fully aware of the very big difference, in life experiences, between me and 99% of the people I'm regularly surrounded to, at uni. I once considered dropping out this year, because I find it VERY hard to focus; lack energy; and there's always a period, everyday, that I feel extremely down and depressed. No doubt my new found 'enlightenment' is the reason for all of this. I have tried to get to know girls, but my desperation and insecurities always got in the way. I pretty sure almost all of them found me creepy in some way or another, despite my best attempts of making sure I don't appear as such. Even a girl, whom I thought was (deep down) really nice - a girl whom I wanted to know more deeply - is now avoiding me. I don't know anymore. I give up. I wanted to vent this out.

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Is he interested or just being nice?

Long story short.. I met a guy at a party abroad through a mutual friend. We didn't chat much coz the atmosphere wasn't really appropriate. I sent him a message on facebook when I got back just saying hi etc, he replied and asked questions in return. We only message once every few days, nothing OTT. His replies are pretty lengthy and he always popped a question in. His latest reply he has again written a long reply, but no question and ended with a full stop... what does this mean? Shall I reply or leave it?

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Live with boyfriend or go into halls.

Me and my boyfriend are both starting university in September and thinking about getting a flat together, we have worked it out financially and it is doable, he will have to commute to his university however it is about 40 minutes and he doesn't mind. Our only concern is that we wont make friends easily, i am not a big drinker and don't like the whole party side of halls but i would like people to go out with once a week, i would also like to be involved with freshers, do you think this is possible when not in halls? I have been with my boyfriend for 6 years, we are 19 now, we practically live in each others houses now, i know thats not the same but its not moving in with him i'm worried about its making new friends.

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moving on from unrequited love

Feeling completely stuck in a rut after being rejected just under 3 months ago by a friend at uni who I gradually developed strong feelings for. We no longer hang out, I broke contact with her and deleted her number but I still keep daydreaming about her constantly and just want to stay in my room away from people and everything seems bleak and has been that way for a while now. so how do I get some will and motivation back knowing that I'll never probably even speak with her as friends again, let alone have a relationship?

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What's wrong with me?

I'm 21 years old, and in university. Sometimes I feel like people look at me differently, and that girls are really turned off by me. I've always been insecure about how young I look, often people say things like 'You look about 12', although that is mostly banter between friends. I am 5 ft 8, but I'm pretty thin (around 130 pounds). I shower everyday, I like to look smart, and not to blow my own trumpet but I would say I'm at least average when it comes to my face (My face makes me look pretty young aswell). Not to seem stupid, but are girls turned off by: A. Short/Thin guys? B: Guys that look pretty young? C: Guys that look kind of geeky? (Although I do a science course, so everyone in my modules is pretty much a geek) I just honestly want to find out what I can do to improve my appearance, or attitude.

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Long distance relationship- 5600miles apart?

Hi everyone, I am a korean girl who used to study in a university as an exchange student for a year. So I've been with him for 8months and now I'm going back to Korea in march. He is british and lives in england and it's thousand miles away from korea, but i still dont want to break up with him. Every time I meet up with him i constantly act like a bitch these days, maybe its because im afraid of falling in love more and more with him. Im sure I can come to england for a holiday and he can come too, but i cant even imagine so many days apart.. He keeps saying every things going to be alright, lets just see how things go like this. So my question is, is there anyone who's in a long distance relationship like me and how does it go? Are you still in a relationship? I'll be really thankful for any advices!

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Female point of view please

I've been married to my wife for 3.5 years and it will be 6 years since our first date next week. We have an 8 month old daughter together. I'm asking if the women out there think that there is anyway to save my marriage. My wife decided that she wanted a divorce. She says that she does not feel safe with me. After reading the 5 Love Languages book, I realize that I have not been showing her love in her language either. We are both under a lot of stress outside of just our marriage. I am in school for my Masters and spend a lot of time doing research. I also work a full time job that takes me away for 24 hours every third day. She works in healthcare working 4p-4a 13 nights a month. She has been coming home and going to bed by 5am and then taking care if the baby when she gets up around 9-10 for the past 6 months. Not that I don't want to help but school and work takes me away in the mornings. She has said "I love you so much" just a few weeks ago and even said she still loves me during all of this just not in an intimate way. I read about the walk away wife syndrome and it seems exactly like our situation. I even mentioned that to her as well. I am not sure that it is all me that makes her want the divorce. I think she is exhausted physically as well as emotionally because of me. I have told her I wanted to change the problems that she has brought in the past so that we could work on things. She said I should of done it sooner which I agree that I should have. I have also scheduled counseling for myself to get help with some anger/temper issues that I have (she says that's 90% of her problems with me). I love this woman more than anything on this planet and would do anything to get her back. I have just done a horrible job at showing her this over the years. I realize now after reading that book that her love language is acts of service and quality time. Since she asked me to move out, quality time is not really an option. I have been going to our house and cleaning it from top to bottom for her to show her that I care and want to do the things she needs. I hope that is not wrong of me (she knows I go over there when she is at work to get things and says she is not mad about it). Is there any way to save my marriage? Am I doing things that will hurt my chances or should I just continue to show my commitment to seeking help and wanting to do the right things for her? I do not want to lose her as she is my true reason for being. I have been in other long term dating relationships and realize that she is the only one for me (she does not have any past relationship exp eriences...at least not serious ones). I don't want to sound like a pansy here but she really is everything to me. Any help from a woman on how I can win her back if that is even possible would be appreciated .

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