what to do

When I met megan it love at first site.It was good at first until I started noticing odd things about her like I had never been to her house(we would always hookup at my house or hotels) she always wanted to text instead of talking on the phone and 8pm-11am she was no where to be found and on the weekends it was virtually impossible to get in touch with her.One day while she was taking a nap(she always took short naps after sex but would never spend the night) I started searching her things and was able to get an address I wait about 1hour after she left and decide to surprise her.When I got to the address and rung the doorbell to my surprise a man came to the door I asked did megan live here he said yes she was my wife what do you want with her.I was shocked but right then and there I let him know everything we had been doing for the last 7months and I left.About 3weeks later I got call from megan I decide to answer so I could tear her a new one but not only was she on the line it was also her husband they told me not to contact her again because they had decide to work on there marriage I agreed and told him i'm sorry for ruining your marriage you wouldn't here from me again and they hung up.Megan called me and told me that she missed me and would like to see me again to catch up I asked her was she still married she said "yes but it'll be ok because this time we won't get caught I promise"(what a *****) what should I do should contact her husband or let it go:scratchhead:

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

I can't believe this ... what do I do next?

I am 37, live in Texas and have been married for almost 8 years with 3 girls (7,4,1). My wife had an emotional affair for 3-4 weeks with a friend from highschool that lives in New York. The best I can dig up this is true that he lives in New York. I found out about the affair by complete accident by doing something in her e-mail account. I found 1 e-mail of a texting dialogue talking about amazing and sexy pictures my wife was sending him. Her sent, trash, inbox, etc. have all been cleared out and no record of anything. I checked our cell phone logs and she sent him about 2,000 text messages and over 200 picture messages over the 3-4 week period. Over the same time period she was also sending me pictures. They started off just her in sexy clothes and progressed to completed naked pictures. She has admitted to this and that they were the same pictures sent to me and more. She also admits they were inappropriate. I know that she sent the same ones t o OM because they were sent at almost the same time. She sent him over 200 picture text messages and sent me about 25 over the same time. Who knows what other pictures where sent or what e-mails were sent. After I found out, I demanded she stop talking to him immediately and we get in couseling. She did stop talking to him because they have not talked at all per the phone logs. She has told me she had an EA and that she agrees to stop talking with him, but it is not over. We have been in counseling and it goes good and bad sometimes. As anyone knows this is a emotional roller coaster. You get sad, then mad, then confused, then angry, then sad, etc. I have told the counselor and my wife that I need everything to be open and honest. She has agreed, but little things keep happening. I found out that she blocked me from facebook, changed her e-mail password, has a lock on her cell phone and just wants her privacy. The major thing now is she bought a prepaid cell phone. I asked why she bought it and she said because I was tracking her (true). I asked why she needed a prepaid cell phone if she wasn't doing anything and had nothing to hide ... no response. My gut (which has been right almost everytime lately) tells me she is using this prepaid cell phone to talk with him. I have read that EA are usually worse than PA because it is in your mind and your feelings. I do not think you can just stop EA and feel like it is still going on. I am doing my snooping and have no evidence anything is going on, but my gut tells me something is. Counselor said something has happened and she has gone off the deep end and said she will eventually come back. This is not the woman I married and is completely tearing my entire family apart. My parents and even her parents are completely pissed at her and have chewed her out left and right. Nothing and no one has changed what she wants. I know that a divorce will be very hard for my little girls and will be bad for them in the long run. My wife has no education and could barely take care of her self much less having 3 kids. She is not making good decisions like smoking pot once. If she gets the kids who knows what she will expose them to and I will live the rest of my life helping fix my kids what she has messed up. She has issues from growing up about her parents being way over the top protective and have crippled her. She can barely make decisions for her self. She has told me that she does not feel the same way about me anymore and does not want to be married. I still love her and want this to work for me and my kids. Sorry if this is tough to follow, but so much has happened in a short amount of time and feel like I am just rambling. I have just in the last couple of days said I am done, but we live 4 hours from home and have no one to help or go to. We are still living in the same house and she has moved into 1 of our daughters rooms. Just found out today she still has the prepaid cell phone. I asked my oldest daugher where mom keeps her other phone and she said she did not know. She said mom talks and texts on it all the time. She has described it to me and it is different from the phone I know about. She asks mom what phone that is and she says non of my daughters business. She said that mommy is keeping secrets and that is not nice. Do not know what to do? At this point I have financially protected myself the best I can and seems like things have settled down a little. Counselor told me if I do not know what to do, then the best thing to do is nothing. Guess I am just hoping for a miracle or maybe I am just an idot. HELP!

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Okay I'm a idiot

Hey first time poster here. I'll try to be brief: Last year I reconnected with a girl I knew in high school who was recently divorced. We began a casual relationship because obviously it was too soon for her to get serious and I was still recovering from a failed 3 year relationship. As the months rolled by we both started developing genuine feelings for each other as we discovered that we shared many interests and sentiments that went beyond the bedroom and we had a connection that allowed us to talk for hours without even kissing. Eventually she asked she wanted to start a serious relationship with me and my selfish dumb ass kind of wigged out and said no. Obviously things cooled after that and she eventually started seeing more of this other guy (who is a mutual friend) who had been lingering around her, but she wasn't feeling him and plus she still had feelings for me. Other guy had no idea we were involved, but he said he wanted to be more than friend with her. After weeks of him pestering her and always being... there... she finally started dating him. By the way, she relaying all this to me as she struggled to sort her feelings out with this guy. Yes, I know...she was giving me some major hints that I just didn't see. I tried being the "good friend" by not wanting to influence her personal life since we weren't "official" and I was still being a pussy about the commitment thing. Eventually she started dating him and when I found out I was pretty damn bummed. I went out with a friend to take my mind off of her and of COURSE they are at the same damn bar. It was kind of awkward talking this this guy about how happy he is that he is with her and how she would never take advantage of him like the other and blah blah. Later that night, I get a facebook message from her asking how I was and that's when i just poured my freaking heart out to her. Telling her I made a huge mistake, i loved her, I wanted her and everything else. To my surprised she reciprocated! She said she only dated other guy because she honestly thought I wasn't ready. I was definitely ready, but too fucking scared to admit it. Now I'm admitting it freely and openly and she is doing the same! Eventually she stops seeing other guy which devastates him and hurt her and we began starting a future together. She laid it down that she wanted a long term relationship that involved her kids (of course) and I agreed to all of it. I just said you might need to wait awhile for me to get stabilized financially to make that happen. THAT'S where I fucked up. Thanks to my poor ass communication skills she felt that I still wasn't ready, but in my HEAD I meant to say that she would have to wait while we were still together. So in her mind we were back to fuck-buddy mode while she tried to re-open relations with other guy who was still in the background. To me, we were in a committed relationship. She did talk about other guy and her concern over his anger, but my dumb ass thought she was just trying to reconcile with him as friends. I thought everything was hunky dory as we continued being intimate, I did the mushy bf things and even hung out with her and her kids (who loved me btw, more than other guy). Again she was dropping all sorts of "last chance" hints at me until she finally told me that she was going to give other guy an earnest try. I was devastated! I did not see that coming! After being pissed off for a few days I calmed down enough enough to discuss things with her and some friends (separately) and that's when I had my wake up call. I was so fucking clueless. I had basically driven this woman into the arms of other guy... a guy I might add is almost forty and sleeping on a mattress at a friend's house at the time. So my natural instinct was to be all alpha male and try to win her back with this new found knowledge, but instead I decided to go with the ol' "if you love them you'll let them go". Plus she said she didn't want me to do the former. I think this split up is especially hard to get over because at least if we were officially dating and we broke up for more concrete reasons, it would be easier to accept, but in this case, thanks to my stupidity, our relationship never had a chance to even start so now those "what ifs" and "if only" thoughts are extra strong.

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629984

Just about ready to give up....

My wife maybe soon to be ex wife has been through a lot. I cheated on her with one of my co workers almost 8months ago. Our marriage was falling apart and at its low point. We stopped talking to each other and when I tried to talk to her or wanted her to listen to me, she always ignored me or tuned me down. Our sex life was dull and we haven't had sex in a year. She had two miscarriages and things at work was hectic. Long story short I told my wife about the affair because I felt guilty and couldn't stand to look at her. I went to counseling and she suggested I tell my wife. When I did it broke my heart. The look on her face said it all. She told me she hated me she never wants to see me again..Then she said that she had an affair too and our youngest child might not be mine. She stormed out and told me she hopes I die and rot in hell. She filed divorce papers and promised me I would never see our children again. Currently we are living in differe nt homes. However I am still trying to work on our marriage. I gave her all of my passwords to all of my accounts. She has my bank statements calls and visits my job at random times. A few months ago we had sex. I thought she forgave me but it made it worse. After we were done she started crying,cussed me out, and told me she couldn't stand to look at me. She yelled at me to leave so I did. It made me feel horrible. She still wants to have sex but I refused and told her no. Then she accused me of cheating on her again and starts crying. I tried to console her but she tells me to leave and go away. She said some hateful things to me but it always makes me upset when she always brings up the affair. Currently we share custody of the kids but she always tries to use our kids to her advantage. She tells them daddy is a bad man and hurts mommy. She keeps telling hem daddy is a cheater and can't be trusted. When We have disagreements she always brings up the affair. It's like she is holding it over my head and uses it to her advantage. When she does that I feel bad and do whatever she wants me to do right away. Both of us are in counseling. However my wife only goes every once in a while. she said I'm the one with the problem nit her. But if my wife doesn't want to work on our marriage and keeps using guilt to get me to do the things she wants me to do, then maybe I will sign the divorce papers. I love my wife with all my heart. She gave me beautiful children, a nice home, and we have been together since college. We created a life together. We were each others first. I love her and my children. But if she wants out then maybe I should just let go. I'm confused on what to do. Can anyone please give me some advice? I usually don't talk about this kind of stuff with strangers but I will listen to any suggestions or advice you may have. I thought by now she would forgive me and move past this.

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Just wondering about this today......

So my BF and I are close to celebrating our 1 year anniversary together and I was wondering when does the POSOW celebrate hers? The day she started bonking my ExH or the D-Day that I kicked him out and he moved in with her? Any OW want to answer this question?

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Mysterious Sore Throat

Ok... get your Inspector Gadget tools out, this ailment has me extremely stumped. For the past ~2 weeks I have had a MILD sore throat. Its on/off throughout the day and I have chatted with my doctor via email and seen a PA at our local walkin clinic. Here is everything I know so far. 1. I have had strep 2-3 times in the past 12 months. However, both a rapid strep and culture strep have come back negative for this case. The PA put me on antibiotics as a 'just in case' measure Thursday, 9/12. As of this post I haven't noticed them helping much. 2. Test for mono at the walkin was negative. (I had mono previously in 2011). 3. I have GERD, but my diet has not changed. I doubled my meds for it about a week ago and no change situation. 4. Allergies are unknown. I did a allergy panel with a specialist a ~year ago and the only one that tested barely positive was cat dander. I don't own a cat nor am near any. 5. I literally have no other symptoms. My temp was 98.4 at the walkin visit. My nose is not congested or runny. No chills/sneezing/coughing. No swelling in neck that I can notice. An occasional headache. I have noticed increase fatigue (I take 1-2 hour naps after work each day). 6. I seem to notice the irritation is worst in the morning, after my naps, when I am talking a lot. Note it doesn't "hurt", it is merely the feeling of dry/yuckiness. It doesn't hurt to swallow, sneeze, cough, etc. My guesses are change of season (its getting cooler and dryer up here in Vermont). Though I don't ever recall having this problem in past years. Could indeed be GERD related, though no idea why it would change all of the sudden. And lastly a newly developed allergy I am not aware of. I will be doing my doc again in person this week, hopefully we can figure it out but I thought I would ask if anyone else has had similar problems in the past.

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629984

Would you mind it if you were the only person on the planet?

I'm quite self-sufficient and I read these relationship posts that say the same thing over and over again about how lonely they are. I don't quite understand why people feel lonely and why they are so reliant on other people who tend to be unreliable for their happiness, in fact I often imagine being the only person alive or say on an island or the planet, I imagine having to fend for myself and all those manly challenges. Fetch me my harpoon. Does anyone else mind being the only person on an island or the planet? Unfortunatley, I'm living in a busy city with over-crowded streets on all compass directions, so you can imagine how I feel. If there's one thing I have learnt about life's events and people is that "people" are the most unreliable. You only have your self for your own completion and your own fate. Does anyone else share this philosophy?

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Privacy in the bedroom

Hello All, Pat and I have dated for almost a year. There has been some tough times, but a lot more of the great times. I have quietly bristled in the past about being introduced by her as a "friend." Her remaining"Single" and Interested in "Men" status on Facebook ( says she lost her password. I dealt with her not kissing me or even holding hands in front of her co-workers. I can deal with what seems to be a large number of men that she has dated in recent years. Maybe I'm too laid back but we now find ourelves in heated and painful debate, on the edge of walking away from each other and it is eating me up inside. When we first got together, she mentioned that her oldest son, who is mildly Autistic, had a bad night and slept in bed with her. This bothered me but I didn't say anything. Months went by and I got to know her son better. He even came along on a vacation with her and I. A few weeks ago, I was staying the night at her house. It's early morning darkness and things are starting to get interesting between us, she's nude and I'm not far behind, when her son walks in and gets into bed beside her. The following week, he did the same thing ,a week later, he's having another bad night on a night that I'm staying over and she brings him in to sleep on the floor of her bedroom. SHe asked if I wanted to talk with her, but I didn't know what I could say. We spent a long and sleepless night beside each other. The usual cuddling and affection were pretty much gone, and the next day I had a sinking feeling that there was real trouble in our relationship. I knew saying something would put me on a slippery slope, but dammit...I just couldn't hold it in! We are both very angry with each other and neither is budging an inch. She feels like I don't like her son and don't understand his Autism and special needs. Neither of those are true and I've been very understanding. Dating a woman with children can be tough. A child with special needs is a lot tougher yet, but I feel that even with Autism, he's in his early teens and that's too damned old to be in the bed, or bedroom with mom. She thinks I'm totally wrong and told me that all of her friends agree with her (which is not a surprise.)I feel like there should be some degree of privacy and sanctuary in the bedroom, but if I'm out of line in any way...guess some other opinions of those who are not on one side or the other, and objectivity would be welcome. I don't know what to do. My guts are in knots and I'm not really sleeping. I miss her badly (we've spent almost a week apart) bu t it seems every time we try to talk, it just leads to bitterness and anger.

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629984

My Wife's Married Male Friend

Hi All. Let me start by saying that I believe that a marriage is worth saving up to a point and that right now I am getting there. I moved my family to another city to kind of start over. My Family is very important to me and I want them to have the best life they can. We enrolled my daughter in a school so she could start JK. Some time went by and My Wife became friends with a couple who aren't technically married but they have been together for almost ten years and appear to have a stable relationship which my wife and I have not had in a very long time. She had even spent time there and had stayed there pretty late. She told me that these friends of hers had made her laugh and she felt good to have them. I was happy about this because my wife is a friendly person and deserves to have good friends. She became friends with the Wife first and then the husband. So anyway she became friends with them and engaged in a great deal of texting which for my liking became. I really didn't care too much for the texting because it semed to take up a lot of her time when she was at home and I felt as though it was taking time away from our 3 kids. Then a while back my wife and I were discussing something and she asked me if I would ever consider taking a dance class with her. She mentioned ballroom da ncing and I told her yeah I would take a class with you for sure. She then proceeded to ask If I would have a problem if she took a class where she would have another male partner. I promptly said "no". The reason behind this response was because My Wife and I have never had opposite sex friends outside of our relationship and I kinda had a feeling that she was trying to get at something about perhaps doing something with her new married male friend. She didn't come right out and say his name but I had a hunch. So later the next day I think it was the tires on our car needed replacing so I told her I was gonna take care of it and I could get a good deal from my tire guy. Well she promptly went into a frenzy..telling me I didn't value her input and that her feelings in the matter and that she was going to be taking a dance class with her "partner" and that they were gonna be doing the kind of dancing that they wanted to do. All this because I wanted to get tires for th e car. I ended up not getting the tires and came back home and got bargain basement tires that she wanted...she actually wanted to get second hand tires. I was infuriated that she was going to dance with this guy and more so at the fact that she never even had the courtesy of asking me when I had already found out that she basically told me I had to be alright with it. I even went as far as to talk with his wife about it and tell her how I felt. she agreed with me and told him he couldn't dance if I did not agree with it. He asked his wife and she said yes but I'm not comfortable at all with my Wife spending any time with another man especially in that context. Then there was the sexting with an ex boyfriend that I caught her doing. I was suspicious because my wife hides her phone all the time and I was completely floored when I read the things that they were sending each other. I almost walked out on her. She Promptly ended contact with him and deleted him from her phone. This has made me distrust her intensely. The contact with her new friends almost ended because of what she had done with this guy. Getting back to the dancing...Wanting to intentionally spend this kind of time with a male friend infuriated me and I have never been the jealous type until all this happened. When spring arrived she even became getting dressed up with makeup and hair all done up just to bring my daughter to school in the morning. I immediately thought it was because of her male friend but she told me it was because she was feeling better about herself. I could not help but think this was for different reasons. My Wife has an interest in photography which I share with her but she felt the need to go out to take photos with her new male friend because he has a nice dslr camera and he knows spots around the city. This has caused me to be very suspicious of his motives as he is friendly with my wife and I don't like it at all. My Wife and I have never had opposite sex friends outside of our relationship and I feel there is a very good reason for this. I don't think it's appropriate. I allowed my wife one time to go out for night pics with this guy and she left the house at 9:15 and didn't return until 1 am. I was pissed off and she then told me she wasn't gonna take night pics with him for a while. I recently had been privy to my wife's text messages and noticed that she had plans to sneak out to take night pics without telling me. There has been so much animosity between me and this guy just under the surface...Now I don't even talk with him or his wife because I can't fathom how she can be ok with My Wife and Him being out alone like that. Part of me thought they might be more "open" then I once thought. Also My Wife has been discussing starting a photo business with this guy behind my back. She is so determined to do things with him...her family has notice her change in behaviour around him....excessive make up...getitng herself dolled up when he's around. She doesn't listen when people tell her what she's doing is wrong. Even his Wife has told h er she needs to respect my feelings and she should be making me dance with her and take pictures. As it stand right now I'm waiting for my Wife to go and sneak out to take these pics so I can confront her and basically make her decide because I won't be allowing her to spend any more time with him at this point. Please I need some perspective on this as I have read how these things can always turn into something else and I don't like being told I need to "get over" it or just trust her because situations like this never start out full blown...they always have a way of developing over time. I don't plan on being one of those guys who's wife sits him down to tell him that it" just happened" and she doesn't know how because I know exactly how it happened....because I didn't take steps to prevent it from happening in the first place.

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Greeting Men

Hi, My partner has an issue with the way I greet and say bye to men. I was leaving a social gathering and saying goodbye to my cousins husband, he gave me a hug. I proceed to say goodbye to the other men in the room, I struck out my hand for a handshake but he gave me a hug instead. The next person did the same. When I got into the car my partner had ago at me. Saying why am hugging strangers goodbye ect because he does not do it to there partners. It wasn't a tight embrace but it has caused an issue? He has previously mention this and my intention was not to hug the person but that's what happened. Opinions please. What is the etiquette for this?

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Timing on introducing kids to someone new

Hello all, I did a search on the forum for advice for introducing someone new to my kids. However, I kept getting results on people asking about their exes introducing THEIR new significant others. My situation - separated almost two years, divorce will be final by mid October. I have three children 6, 4, 2 where the oldest who is the most aware seems to have accepted that Mommy and Daddy are no longer together and will not get back together. My 4 year old doesn't question the situation, but I'm sure he will down the road. My 2 year old knows no different. She only knows Mommy is Mommy, and Daddy lives elsewhere and comes to visit a couple times a week. Anyway, I've been dating someone for 3 months and he definitely is not rushing meeting the kids. He's excited to meet them, but totally understands that it's on my timeline and he wants me to be 100% comfortable with it whether it be next month or next year or a couple years down the road. He's awesome. My plan is to wait til the 6 month mark to see where we stand and to reassess when I'd like to my kids to meet him. I'd like at some point after the 6 month mark to have him meet the kids in a casual setting, like an outing to a museum or something else with distractions to see how he interacts with them. This would be no different than the kids hanging out with other friends of mine who accompany us out for the day or come and hang out at the house with us. There would be no PDA, it would be totally friendly and casual. I'd rather do that and see if it clicks before getting more invested in the relationship. He definitely has long term potential. Even after 3 months, I think we are pretty serious, but of course, I'm cautious. I want to be smart about it. And there's no way I'd introduce them this early on. What has everyone else done? What have been your experiences? I've dated here and there, but it was nothing and my kids know nothing about it. This is totally different. Please give me some advice! Thanks all!

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Ive been sacked today / new 'relationship' problems..In need of some serious advice:(

I'm just venting before I go to bed, hopefully I'll wake up to see some good advice or a positive.... I got fired today- They didn't even tell me why, I haven't been working there that long to have any working rights... But I'm almost certain that the hotel is loosing money and cutting back. Not even one days notice, I'm officially unemployed :( Not having a job is also going to effect my "blossoming relationship". It's nothing as of yet but I had high hopes and he did say he was looking for something serious. We met online thinking nothing but of it (neither of us were looking for anything) but after a month of texting then progressing onto phone calls we decided to meet up and spent the evening/night together...Its now been two months since we started talking and i was planning to see him at the end of the month again but don't know if I can/regularly(ish) now as I need to be careful with money. He lives a 2 hour train journey away and is a student so has even less funds than I do. I like him a lot, to the point where I've been thinking "maybe he's the one", i know I've only seen him once in person but Its been two months and we talk daily, I even miss him sometimes, the communication... I literally can't fault him, he's really good looking plus the nicest guy that I've ever met and he's very clever (medicine student), well travelled/interesting...but...I get the feeling that i think A LOT more of it than he does. He very laid back and has a lot of fun going on in his life at uni- meeting people, partying regularly. Whereas I don't- My life revolved around work mainly and now it will revolve around finding a job (which could take months) I've been messed around badly in the past and I'm paranoid of it happening again- little things e.g i see that he's received my Whatsapp and crosses it off his screen (it'll have two ticks next to the message) yet two hours later he still hasn't bothered or been TOO busy to open and read it fully. ...Basically, I'm not sure what to do with him. I feel that it's just going to end in heartache. I don't want to tell him that I'm now unemployed so I've just said that I need to go to Grenoble (France- where my grandad lives) because my grandads turned seriously unwell, we'll still talk on what'sapp as normal but I'm unsure to when I can next meet up with him. He messaged me this a few hours ago when discussing where does this issue of me being out of the country for a bit leave us " I've gone out now. I'd like to see you again but at the same time we've just been chatting phone/text and the only time we've met in person it didn't go well. I think you're a nice girl and we could hit it off but at the same time I feel like it's been difficult past week more so than it should be considering we're not going out and have met once I'd like to see you again, it's up to you whether you'd like to see me again " So i'll explain that... The first and last time we met didn't go overly well- I was extremely warn out from work and didn't feel well, so tired I literally felt sick when I ate. He had all these ideas for the night and wanted to take me to a fancy restaurant too, whereas I was there feeling completely not myself and just couldn't be bothered- it was me not him, he knows all this... And when he says that it's been a "difficult past week" I think I've just been a bit too much... I messaged him back saying " What do you mean it's been a difficult past week considering we're not going out? Do you think I should chill off slightly? Perhaps. Sorry, I didn't realise I was being like that...Will do... I guess I'm quite upfront and don't really like to play games- if I want to speak or have something to say then I'll say it, even when I probably know i shouldn't :) better than my one a day text ey, least I make an effort now and from that you should know that I don't just talk to anyone... Of course I want to see you again! I don't need reminding that last time didn't go too well, but I'm pretty sure it will next next time! :) How's your night going? Xx" Has anyone got any advice regarding this guy or any positive "one door closes another opens" with regards to the job loss (but a slightly better line than that please, give me some inspiration/motivation etc) xx

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Good relationships

Quite a few of threads these days are about how bad some people's relationships are...but i just wanted to create this thread and ask everyone what their favourite moments/relationship tips are:) all input is welcome....thanks in advance Posted from TSR Mobile

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

I've been sacked today / new 'relationship' problems ...

It's long but please take some time to read / reply...even just the one person! Grateful. I'm just venting before I go to bed, hopefully I'll wake up to see some good advice or a positive.... But right now my plans and my job has just crashed and burt :( I got fired today- They didn't even tell me why, I haven't been working there that long to have any working rights... But I'm almost certain that the hotel is loosing money and cutting back. Not even one days notice, I'm officially unemployed :( Not having a job is also going to effect my "blossoming relationship". It's nothing as of yet but I had high hopes and he did say he was looking for something serious. We met online thinking nothing but of it (neither of us were looking for anything) but after a month of texting then progressing onto phone calls we decided to meet up and spent the evening/night together...Its now been two months since we started talking and i was planning to see him at the end of the month again but don't know if I can/regularly(ish) now as I need to be careful with money. He lives a 2 hour train journey away and is a student so has even less funds than I do. I like him a lot, to the point where I've been thinking "maybe he's the one", i know I've only seen him once in person but Its been two months and we talk daily, I even miss him sometimes, the communication... I literally can't fault him, he's really good looking plus the nicest guy that I've ever met and he's very clever (medicine student), well travelled/interesting...but...I get the feeling that i think A LOT more of it than he does. He very laid back and has a lot of fun going on in his life at uni- meeting people, partying regularly. Whereas I don't- My life revolved around work mainly and now it will revolve around finding a job (which could take months) I've been messed around badly in the past and I'm paranoid of it happening again- little things e.g i see that he's received my Whatsapp and crosses it off his screen (it'll have two ticks next to the message) yet two hours later he still hasn't bothered or been TOO busy to open and read it fully. ...Basically, I'm not sure what to do with him. I feel that it's just going to end in heartache. I don't want to tell him that I'm now unemployed so I've just said that I need to go to Grenoble (France- where my grandad lives) because my grandads turned seriously unwell, we'll still talk on what'sapp as normal but I'm unsure to when I can next meet up with him. He messaged me this a few hours ago when discussing where does this issue of me being out of the country for a bit leave us " I've gone out now. I'd like to see you again but at the same time we've just been chatting phone/text and the only time we've met in person it didn't go well. I think you're a nice girl and we could hit it off but at the same time I feel like it's been difficult past week more so than it should be considering we're not going out and have met once I'd like to see you again, it's up to you whether you'd like to see me again " So i'll explain that... The first and last time we met didn't go overly well- I was extremely warn out from work and didn't feel well, so tired I literally felt sick when I ate. He had all these ideas for the night and wanted to take me to a fancy restaurant too, whereas I was there feeling completely not myself and just couldn't be bothered- it was me not him, he knows all this... And when he says that it's been a "difficult past week" I think I've just been a bit too much... I messaged him back saying " What do you mean it's been a difficult past week considering we're not going out? Do you think I should chill off slightly? Perhaps. Sorry, I didn't realise I was being like that...Will do... I guess I'm quite upfront and don't really like to play games- if I want to speak or have something to say then I'll say it, even when I probably know i shouldn't :) better than my one a day text ey, least I make an effort now and from that you should know that I don't just talk to anyone... Of course I want to see you again! I don't need reminding that last time didn't go too well, but I'm pretty sure it will next next time! :) How's your night going? Xx" Has anyone got any advice regarding this guy or any positive "one door closes another opens" with regards to the job loss (but a slightly better line than that please, give me some inspiration/motivation etc) xx

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Unsure and Need Advice

Okay, I am new here, but I am hoping some of you guys can help me figure some stuff out. So I started seeing someone, I think. We met a week ago and have hung out almost every night since. He is, well he is a character, lol. He usually doesn't like people, but we hit it off. He says that he wants me to like him as much as he likes me and that I have absolutely no reason to be apprehensive, and after I told him about a bad experience with someone he told me he would never do what that person did. He told me to let my guard down and have faith in him, so I am trying to do just that, but it is hard. Last night I went over to his place again, after he had a terrible day, we had some drinks and played video games and had tons of fun. He said that it makes him mad that I think he is going to treat me like other guys, and I said I was sorry but just like he keeps saying I am too good to be true, I think he is too. He lets me stay at his house when he isn 't there and cooks for me (which he says he doesn't do for just anyone). He gets aggravated because I am not as trusting as he is with me. Then, a couple of nights ago, he asked why I don't want to fool around with him and I said because I wasn't his girl. Then he was like you don't think you are my girl? I thought it was kind of implied, I mean we haven't had that conversation yet but I figured you knew that you were my girl. Then he was like do you want to be my girl, and I said yes, I have been waiting for him to ask and he said then you're my girl. Then we proceeded, to well, do stuff. I didn't go over the next night, but I did last night as I mentioned above and everything was fine. Then he jokingly said he had to kick me out because he had to leave and he kissed me goodbye and told me to have fun packing my stuff up with my mom (we are moving into a new house). He doesn't text a lot because of his job and he has a pretty busy weekend, but I just have reservations and kind of would like an outside view. First, if he said I am his girl does that mean we are official? And secondly, does it seem like he is really serious?

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629984

forrest gump's mama was right...

gump's mama was right life is like a box of chocolates you never know what youre gonna get. it seems like everyday in rec is like that box of candy! .1 1/2 days after our lastest setback, my h was giving me mixed signals @ rec ...today he seems almost, almost normal..but this is after he leaves it at "I don't know,maybe I should disappear ,we've grown apart" how can someone be so wishy washy,so confused so mixed up after 32 yrs you'd think it would be a no brainer either you want me or you don't,either you want thinks better or you don't. in rec do h n wife ever get back on the same page at the same time? why is it so hard sometimes? thanks for listening and any comments ;)

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Men: Please translate this for me:

Hi Guys ~ I know my marriage is kaput but I want to pass this by the men just for some clarity. What does this mean to you: I don't want any more responsibilities. I don't want to be married to you or anyone. I want to be by myself. I am tired of people taking advange of me. I want to do what I want to do when I want to do it. I took care of you and our son and now I am done. It is my time to be selfish. I am going to speak up from now on. If I am by myself no one can hurt me or disappoint me. My shrink told me to be more assertive. Was on antidepressants for 6 years and last week he decided to come off them because he wants to try to "see what happenes." Bought a motorcycle and joined a club. 56 years old. Married 30 years. Separated 6-7 weeks. Father just diagnosed with Alzheimers. Mom died 4 years ago from Alzheimers. Brother divorced his wife a few years ago. They were married for 32 years. Brother is dating and traveling. Has cheated on me on and off with the same woman for 4 years. All summer long he was confused if he wanted a divorce. He would ask for delays. He could not file so he "treated me poorly" so I would file.

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Should I take him back?

I dated this guy for 10 months. He was perfect in almost all ways... He was the first real relationship I ever had! Anyways we broke up 7 months ago because he was really controlling and jealous! Anyways 7 months later I'm still not over him... And after ignoring his very occasional messages I agreed to meet up with him. Everything was so good, we talked and I had an amazing time and I actually miss him so much! Heres the problem I'm not sure if I should trust him that he's changed and consider giving him another chance... also I've been asked out so many times by boys way hotter and stuff yet I have NO feelings for them yet tonight i finally felt some feelings again!!! Sorry it's so long. But what should I do?

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979