My husband and I have been together for nearly six years and married for two. The fighting started almost immediately and I always threatened to leave, but gave him a chance every single time. Its so hard to pinpoint exactly what my issues are with him because there are so many. He makes me feel so under appreciated and like I'm not important to him at all. He never compromises with me on anything. We've tried marriage counseling, but he stopped going after three sessions because he didn't think it was working. Correct me if I'm wrong, but three sessions of marriage counseling is not enough to actually make a difference.
As a result, I met someone online. I have never met this person in real life, it has remained strictly online. We have been talking for two years. He became my solace in a time when I felt like I had no one else to talk to. Feelings and a romance developed, and I admit there is an emotional attachment. Before I had this other man to talk to, I was incredibly depressed. I had contemplated suicide. My husband knew how depressed I was but always accused me of just wanting attention.
My husband knows about it and has since it started, I have never lied to him about it. But now, he is demanding that I remove the other man from my life completely and give my husband access to absolutely everything from my cell phone to my email. He has told me that I have a month to give him everything he is demanding or he will have me forcibly removed from the home we share. My husband promises that this time is different and that he will actually take me into consideration and go to therapy with me, but not until this other man is gone and he is convinced of that.
I understand completely that I what I did was wrong. I am not at all in denial about that and don't want to try and justify what I did. For me, it has never been a question of who I would rather be with. At the moment, my hesitation to comply to my husband's demands is more about whether or not I trust him to actually keep his promise this time. After four years of broken promises, I am finding it very very hard to believe that this time will be any different. I asked if he could at least start doing counseling with me to show me that he intended to keep his promises, but he refuses.
I need some advice on what to do. Do I give my husband what he wants and take his word that this time he does care about our relationship and gets it? Or do I just go with my gut and end the marriage?
As a result, I met someone online. I have never met this person in real life, it has remained strictly online. We have been talking for two years. He became my solace in a time when I felt like I had no one else to talk to. Feelings and a romance developed, and I admit there is an emotional attachment. Before I had this other man to talk to, I was incredibly depressed. I had contemplated suicide. My husband knew how depressed I was but always accused me of just wanting attention.
My husband knows about it and has since it started, I have never lied to him about it. But now, he is demanding that I remove the other man from my life completely and give my husband access to absolutely everything from my cell phone to my email. He has told me that I have a month to give him everything he is demanding or he will have me forcibly removed from the home we share. My husband promises that this time is different and that he will actually take me into consideration and go to therapy with me, but not until this other man is gone and he is convinced of that.
I understand completely that I what I did was wrong. I am not at all in denial about that and don't want to try and justify what I did. For me, it has never been a question of who I would rather be with. At the moment, my hesitation to comply to my husband's demands is more about whether or not I trust him to actually keep his promise this time. After four years of broken promises, I am finding it very very hard to believe that this time will be any different. I asked if he could at least start doing counseling with me to show me that he intended to keep his promises, but he refuses.
I need some advice on what to do. Do I give my husband what he wants and take his word that this time he does care about our relationship and gets it? Or do I just go with my gut and end the marriage?
Put the internet to work for you.
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