So basically, throughout my whole life I haven't had any serious relationships, but I do however find myself drawn to particular guys. But these guys aren't special in anyway, they're just normal and innocent and genuinely nice people, and I'll get drawn to them for a set period of time, making sure that I get their attention. When we get close enough I start to crave them physically, not necessarily sexually, but I tend to cuddle with them and hold hands etc all the time. Then when eventually I know for sure that they like me I withdraw from them as quick as possible. And the thing is I can't help myself, I mean, they're literally the sweetest people, and I think as time goes by I go for even more Innocent guys, which makes me feel even more horrible when I eventually stop liking them so abruptly. Like I just feel like I find a nice boy, I make sure 100% that he likes me, spending time with him, then when I know, I instantly withdraw from him. Nowadays I try not to get attracted to anyone because I'm certain of how it ends, and the thing is it doesn't effect me, I'll be with the person one day, then the next they'll be like any other boy, and I can tell that I've messed them up a little, because I get close with the boy for at least a few months, one boy even years, but I've always wormed my way out before it turned serious. I think it's because I don't want a relationship, just someone to show me affection, but that never works out because then their affection becomes genuine, and I can't force myself to do that.
Does that make me a bad person? Like i seriously try to stop, but I can't help it, what should I do?
Does that make me a bad person? Like i seriously try to stop, but I can't help it, what should I do?
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