A little background:
As of August of last year the child's mother and i started the process of a divorce. Naturally, we do not live in the same house, the temporary orders have granted me custody and we are almost a year in the process and set to HOPEFULLY finish it soon... *cross fingers*
I tend to my kids needs as any parent would - school lunches, im involved with their schools, i do homework with them daily, we go out to places and do things both for structure and fun, wead books, watch TV, go out for walks, etc, etc... I have been taking them to a therapist to help them deal with the divorce but i think her mother and i have done a pretty good job of keeping things between her and I and making the divorce as easy as possibler on them.
Both kids are currently healthy, doing well in school, and seem to be perfectly ok until recently: Over the past few weeks my oldest daughter (she is 8) has caught a NASTY attitude! She goes through mood swings at the drop of a hat, she can go from cold to BOILING HOT in seconds, shere has been a lot of attitudes and picking on her little sister; when i ask her what is upsetting her she is not willing to talk, if she gets mad she "shuts down" and there is nothing that anyone will say to get her out of that state but usually it passes within a few minutes and she is often back to her regular fun loving self!
This is nothing new to me - her mother used to do this and while we never did any arguing in front of them i am fearful that she is taking on some of those traits! I have tried and explained to her that talking about her feelings is completely acceptable and it is usually the only way things can get fixed - when two people communicate, it opens the road to fix the cause of the problem.
Yes, I realize she is a girl and i am a man, but I have never had any issues with her or my other child communicating anything with me - we have been very open and that is something i have always taken pride in as honesty and openness is something i was not always able to get from their mother (lol) so this is very frustrating to me.
Some friends have mentioned that it may be the onset of puberty - cases and studies have shown that puberty is starting to hit females at a much earlier age than what would be considered normal and if that is the case, then so be it but I just hate to see her get so upset and seeing her feeling out of control is stressful as hell!
We typically do a "debriefing" after such an event and I do this to reassure her that noone is mad at her and that it is ok to be in a bad mood somedays but that acting out and lashing out at others is not always acceptable.
Is puberty really hitting this early now days?
any thoughts, concerns or input on this would be greatly appreciated!
Thank you
As of August of last year the child's mother and i started the process of a divorce. Naturally, we do not live in the same house, the temporary orders have granted me custody and we are almost a year in the process and set to HOPEFULLY finish it soon... *cross fingers*
I tend to my kids needs as any parent would - school lunches, im involved with their schools, i do homework with them daily, we go out to places and do things both for structure and fun, wead books, watch TV, go out for walks, etc, etc... I have been taking them to a therapist to help them deal with the divorce but i think her mother and i have done a pretty good job of keeping things between her and I and making the divorce as easy as possibler on them.
Both kids are currently healthy, doing well in school, and seem to be perfectly ok until recently: Over the past few weeks my oldest daughter (she is 8) has caught a NASTY attitude! She goes through mood swings at the drop of a hat, she can go from cold to BOILING HOT in seconds, shere has been a lot of attitudes and picking on her little sister; when i ask her what is upsetting her she is not willing to talk, if she gets mad she "shuts down" and there is nothing that anyone will say to get her out of that state but usually it passes within a few minutes and she is often back to her regular fun loving self!
This is nothing new to me - her mother used to do this and while we never did any arguing in front of them i am fearful that she is taking on some of those traits! I have tried and explained to her that talking about her feelings is completely acceptable and it is usually the only way things can get fixed - when two people communicate, it opens the road to fix the cause of the problem.
Yes, I realize she is a girl and i am a man, but I have never had any issues with her or my other child communicating anything with me - we have been very open and that is something i have always taken pride in as honesty and openness is something i was not always able to get from their mother (lol) so this is very frustrating to me.
Some friends have mentioned that it may be the onset of puberty - cases and studies have shown that puberty is starting to hit females at a much earlier age than what would be considered normal and if that is the case, then so be it but I just hate to see her get so upset and seeing her feeling out of control is stressful as hell!
We typically do a "debriefing" after such an event and I do this to reassure her that noone is mad at her and that it is ok to be in a bad mood somedays but that acting out and lashing out at others is not always acceptable.
Is puberty really hitting this early now days?
any thoughts, concerns or input on this would be greatly appreciated!
Thank you
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