advice and probably how to let go

Im usually not one to talk about much but im in need of advice . Im 26, my wife is 23. Weve been together for 6 years and married for 4. We have a 3 year old lil boy . She has never worked a day in her life, never got a drivers license , both her choice . About a year ago i caught her red handed talking/flirting with an ex. Whole time shes trying to convince me its her cousin . She finally admitted it later. Things seamed ok for a while. Then for reasons i dont know about my neighbor called DSS on us for "doing drugs in front of our son" i laughed. Im clean, told them its a lie but they tested us anyway. She failed for pot. I had no idea. After much hell they didnt take our son thank god. Yet again much arguing and fussing but things seemed ok for a while. About 2 months ago i was texting her while i was at work. (I work night shift from 4pm-6am) i could tell something was off so i called, immediately noticed she was drunk. So i went home telling my boss i had an emergency . Got home to noone there. No wife or son. Called her back and she promised shes at home and she has no idea why im worried , said shes sober (while slurring). I tracked her down (love verizon family locator ) she had been out with my 55 year old single male cousin riding around drinking to the point of stupidity with my son in the car. When i found her naked from the waist down at a friend of hers that she just showed up at around 3am she didnt even know where my son was.(he was asleep in said friends bed). Well that kinda broke me i kicked her out with nothing and signed temporary custody of him to my mom. (14 hour shifts i cant take him alone) we stayed separated for a month before i even spoke to her again. I do still love her. She has spent the last week back home with me. Swearing shes gonna change that shes sorry she was bored. 2 days ago i picked up her phone and found her as a member of a date site. Told me its like Facebook not to worry. Just to talk to people. So i pulled up her messages . I guess telling 8 different men you wanna **** is talking now? And one of them being the ex she almost cheated on me with a yr ago. Now shes telling me " im a grown woman ill do whatever i want when i want". Oh yea and shes pregnant ....told me shes 95% sure its mine. Said shes never cheated but cant remember nothing the night she was with my cousin .......i want her to change so badly but even if she does how can i trust her ever again? Ill be honest, i have HUGE trust issues. Its insanely hard for me to trust someone that has never wronged me much less someone who threw it away.im lost. Im at work on my phone so please excuse typos . Touch screens hate me

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979