I am curious what was "the final straw" for some people who finally decided to move forward with their lives and file for divorce. In particular when there are kids involved.
I've been married 20 years. I don't want to bore with all my details but in the last 4 years my wife has had an affair, spiraled into depression, blames me for much of her unhappiness, and has made little to no effort to rebuild our marriage and/or make our marriage a better place.
We have a cycle I finally recognize where every couple of months I get upset at something that involves her level of engagement in the marriage, we have a fight, and she ups her level of engagement for a couple of weeks and then we go back to how it was. I think she is a depressed person with a victim attitude who most likely fell out of love with me and continues the marriage because it is the easiest choice. Yeah, that's pathetic I know. I am ready to move on.
What hangs me up is I keep feeling like I am waiting for that big something that says it's okay to move on. I KNOW I have given every effort. I know I will be happier moving on. It's gonna kill me because we have 2 girls, 11 & 15, that I worry so much about. I know they are learning from this. I feel like it's because maybe I don't trust myself, my own decision even though I know I've given every effort.
Thoughts are welcome - thank you.
I've been married 20 years. I don't want to bore with all my details but in the last 4 years my wife has had an affair, spiraled into depression, blames me for much of her unhappiness, and has made little to no effort to rebuild our marriage and/or make our marriage a better place.
We have a cycle I finally recognize where every couple of months I get upset at something that involves her level of engagement in the marriage, we have a fight, and she ups her level of engagement for a couple of weeks and then we go back to how it was. I think she is a depressed person with a victim attitude who most likely fell out of love with me and continues the marriage because it is the easiest choice. Yeah, that's pathetic I know. I am ready to move on.
What hangs me up is I keep feeling like I am waiting for that big something that says it's okay to move on. I KNOW I have given every effort. I know I will be happier moving on. It's gonna kill me because we have 2 girls, 11 & 15, that I worry so much about. I know they are learning from this. I feel like it's because maybe I don't trust myself, my own decision even though I know I've given every effort.
Thoughts are welcome - thank you.
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