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I just dont have the balls

Okay so.. guy treated me awful..I really really liked him (probably my first love), than he left for another girl,only to come back, now he wants to meet. I just dont have the balls to say **** off cause i still deep deep inside care for him, but there is another lad who really likes me, and wants to take me out, and im hesitant, I dont know what to do, I know it sees obvious but I cant seem to grow a pair and say go away!!!

help/advice?

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