I found out about my husband's affair by breaking into his phone and reading his messages. I know I shouldn't have done that but I did it because I really love my husband and I had a terrible gut feeling something was going on. I feel terrible about invading his privacy.
He asked me for a divorce (I think? I am unsure of the timeline) before the affair really started but he really pushed for it once he started dating this girl. Once I found out, I called her. She had no idea he was married and she broke it off. She was devastated and she is a real sweetheart. I am grateful for that fact.
I have exposed the affair to his mother, a few friends, my family, and to him. He immediately told me that now there is no hope for our marriage and he is 100% done. He told me calmly and said he has "made peace with" everything that has happened. The other woman told me that he told her that I had cheated on him (not true) and that he had no feelings for me and that what feelings he had for her were real and that whether or not things worked out between them he was still going to divorce me.
Yet the day I found out (Sunday) we had also had sex earlier in the afternoon. We have been eating dinner together, having sex, I've been dropping him off and picking him up from work, and we have been watching tv and hanging out together. He even slept in the same bed as me a handful of times. The other night I rested my head on his lap and he played with my hair and when the blanket fell off my leg while I was sleeping he pulled it back up and then brushed my hair off my face. That doesn't sound like he has no feelings for me but I could be terribly wrong.
So he is moving forward with the divorce. I am obviously very hurt and betrayed but I love my husband dearly and I think our marriage can be saved. I really, truly do. I think with work and repentance on his part we can do it, but he has no willingness to do that at all right now.
The other thing is that he has a friend who is feeding him terrible, false information about me and about marriage. He encouraged this affair and is insisting that my husband needs to break it off because I am controlling and pushy and that he isn't happy with me and I know my husband has started to believe it. While this friend is in the picture feeding him these ideas that my husband now sees as facts, I don't see much hope. This friend is unhappy and alone.... they used to be roommates... and it's almost like a "mentorship". It's sickening and I feel like this friend is literally the devil incarnate, but worse... my husband listens to him.
Is there any hope for us? I sincerely hope so. I am praying my heart out for this situation... praying that I can forgive him and praying that he can see how wonderful our marriage is and was and that there is hope.
He asked me for a divorce (I think? I am unsure of the timeline) before the affair really started but he really pushed for it once he started dating this girl. Once I found out, I called her. She had no idea he was married and she broke it off. She was devastated and she is a real sweetheart. I am grateful for that fact.
I have exposed the affair to his mother, a few friends, my family, and to him. He immediately told me that now there is no hope for our marriage and he is 100% done. He told me calmly and said he has "made peace with" everything that has happened. The other woman told me that he told her that I had cheated on him (not true) and that he had no feelings for me and that what feelings he had for her were real and that whether or not things worked out between them he was still going to divorce me.
Yet the day I found out (Sunday) we had also had sex earlier in the afternoon. We have been eating dinner together, having sex, I've been dropping him off and picking him up from work, and we have been watching tv and hanging out together. He even slept in the same bed as me a handful of times. The other night I rested my head on his lap and he played with my hair and when the blanket fell off my leg while I was sleeping he pulled it back up and then brushed my hair off my face. That doesn't sound like he has no feelings for me but I could be terribly wrong.
So he is moving forward with the divorce. I am obviously very hurt and betrayed but I love my husband dearly and I think our marriage can be saved. I really, truly do. I think with work and repentance on his part we can do it, but he has no willingness to do that at all right now.
The other thing is that he has a friend who is feeding him terrible, false information about me and about marriage. He encouraged this affair and is insisting that my husband needs to break it off because I am controlling and pushy and that he isn't happy with me and I know my husband has started to believe it. While this friend is in the picture feeding him these ideas that my husband now sees as facts, I don't see much hope. This friend is unhappy and alone.... they used to be roommates... and it's almost like a "mentorship". It's sickening and I feel like this friend is literally the devil incarnate, but worse... my husband listens to him.
Is there any hope for us? I sincerely hope so. I am praying my heart out for this situation... praying that I can forgive him and praying that he can see how wonderful our marriage is and was and that there is hope.
Put the internet to work for you.
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