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You will live. Trust me.

Been off of here for along time. Im checking in because when I was on here a couple years ago it was very rare to see updates of people who had went to hell and lived to tell the tale. I went thru my ex wife of 7 yrs leaving me for another man. 3 kids involved. My sons are 10,8,7 now. 3 years ago it was almost a breaking point for me. Such betreyel. So much heartache and adjustment. Went from having kids grab me as I entered the door to an empty home. Looking back I think that was the hardest. A house full of life noisey and crazyness went to so silent u could hear a mouse piss on cotton. That first year was bad. Really bad. If u are now where I was then just hang in there. It will get better. Been 3 full years since my ex wife said she loved another man. I shook his hand today. First time I saw him since everything went down. Hated him and wanted to beat him up for about 2 years. Got passed it a year ago. We never see each other because my ex lives at h er moms. He's made a point to not be around when I am. Saw him today and was very cordial. Truth is I don't give a ****. she is his problem now. I wish them nothing but the best(makes my life easier if she's happy) my kids rarely see him. He's a single guy with no kids. Kind of a good situation for him cause he and her live kidless every weekend. Bottom line is this. I got myself a good girl 2 years ago, I'm really happy. Same time I could be single and just as happy because at the end of the day **** it. If someone doesn't want u, don't fight at all. I wish I could go back in time and cut out all the begging and I love yous. If I could go back in time, I would go back to the day she told me I love someone else and I would be like "ok cool. Sounds good. Wish more than anything I had been like that and had that attitude. Whatever u are going thru you will heal. Doesn't sound good now I know. I really do. Pick yourself up and fight. The best advice I can give is to use this ti me to become who u want to be. Use it as motivation to say "I'm going to live my life and be happy" **** this. I took a rocky approach like how he had Drago on a mirror in rocky 4. I got into great shape and became stronger. I look back at my down time 3 yrs ago and actually appreciate it now. Sounds crazy even as I type but it was almost a fond time in my life. I became who I am today when I went thru that hell. For whatever strange reason I really look back and say to myself wow. I had fun thru that time period. Sure as hell didn't seem like it then but I had a few woman do walk of shames out of my house, had all night casino trips with the boys and many times that I was alone, walking the beach as the sun came up. Many drunken nights watching movies alone. All of that got me to this point. I shook the hand of a man who I was slightly friends with, that betrayed me and took my wife. And it felt great. That handshake gave me a final peace. It was the final step. To everyone out there hurting get to a point when u can forgive whoever did u wrong. U will never heal if u don't. Carrying around hate will weigh u down. Forgiving someone isn't about them, it's about you. And a necessary step if u ever want to recover. I look back on the toughest days of my life with fondness, wish I could relive them again because I really found myself. Made me who I am now. Food for thought for anyone going thru hell.... Wish I could go back in time and be just as cold as my walk away spouse and be like cool. I would give a year off my life to go back and be emotionless just like she was, cause I fought hard and cried a lot of tears. Stand tall everyone, no matter what u go thru u will be ok. It will mold u into a better person
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