Why do we torture ourselves with questions?

So someone smarter than me explain why we ask every little detail. Why do we cause ourselves such pain. I have now been cheated on twice in 9 months by my husband. I have learnt all about cake eating, trickle truth, and all that pain twice in 9 months. Today I sat crying in our old room so upset because I thought he had sex in our bed with the other woman. Turns out it was the couch. Why did he leave me in that pain? Then I found out a trickle truth, he lied about her meeting my children. He said she came over after they were asleep but she didn't. So my kids met her in my old house, or the house I still pay for cause he has no money. He said they did not have sex that night but I just can't believe him. He says I am a *****, he says I will punish him forever, he said he had sex with her cause having sex with me is like having sex with a pillow. Then he says he wants me back and he wants to try and that he broke up with her just for me. I don't know how s omebody is so all over the place. He said that if I am not with him I will become a bitter lonely person with no friends, my kids will hate me, and it is all my fault cause I am heartless and didn't treat him well enough.
So I left and put a call blocker on my phone. And now I sit on my computer trying to figure out how this is all my fault and crying over a man that is not worth crying over. Hmmm maybe I am more messed up that he his. Sorry for the rant I am having a bad day, D-Day 2 is way worse than D-Day 1. Guess I should be glad they were only 9 months apart and not years. There is always a silver lining.

Put the internet to work for you.

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