I apologize in advance if this is long winded but there are a lot of factors, and believe it or not this is the condensed version.
This past Sunday evening my wife of 1 year (6 yrs before marriage) and I were out at dinner and she was a little tipsy from drinking all day. So she was on her phone a lot and not paying attention to me, so I glanced at her screen from across the table and I saw what appeared to be a guys name that I didn't recognize and her sending a cleavage pic. When I asked what she was doing she quickly closed it out and pulled up a pic of her new belly button ring. When we got home and she fell asleep I was able to figure out her swipe pass code and I found a long thread with an ex of hers from high school that she hasn't spoken to in 15 yrs. At first it was a lot of catching up, talking about his kids, how he screwed up letting her go etc.. Then he started calling her beautiful and from there it got more sexual. My wife said he did things for her that I don't, and she also said I go out of town for work every few months. He sent her nude pics and she sent cleavage pics and pics of her face. This was way more than light flirting.
I also briefly saw her much shorter thread with another guy where he was talking dirty to her and asked for pics, for which my wife replied: use snapchat because it deletes the evidence. All she told me was that she knew if from back home. Unfortunately while hooking up to my pc to save all this I could not remember the pass code and was permanently locked out of her phone. She woke up and asked if I had seen her phone and I confronted her. She didn't try to deny it. She deleted everything off her phone so now I'll never know if it was just 2 guys. I can't believe a word she says and I fear that if I stay with her she is bound to cheat again.
I looked at the phone and text records and the talking to the 1st guy had started 5 days prior, which she told me before I got the records. Over 430 messages in 5 days, and 2 late night calls both over 20 minutes. To make matters worse I noticed another # showing up a lot and she told me it was a guy she works with that is just a friend. He is married and has 2 kids and yet they were texting a at late hrs of the night. Who does that? The 2 guys she was sexting with live on the other side of the country so definitely no physical contact. She swears the guy from work is a friend and said she was sexting the other guys because it made her feel good to be complimented and to have her ex tell her he screwed up was gratifying and provided closure. She has also gained a little weight the last coupe years and doesn't feel sexy anymore. I still think she's gorgeous and I can barely keep my hands off her. But I asked her why the hell she would delete her texts with the coworker if she had nothing to hide and she said " I didn't think I needed to defend every one of my conversations". Unbelievable!That would have given her some credibility.
I love her more than life itself and I thought our marriage was great. She swears she loves me and didn't mean to hurt me so bad. She says she is very happy with me and even told that to sexting guy #1 when he asked. I just don't understand why a happy wife would stray for some emotional attention. I think I am a great husband, although I could compliment her more and say sweet things more. I am so torn up right now and of course I can't talk to anyone about this. My trust in her is broken and I don't know if it can ever be repaired. I am just looking for advice from people that have gone through this. Thanks for reading this long diatribe.
This past Sunday evening my wife of 1 year (6 yrs before marriage) and I were out at dinner and she was a little tipsy from drinking all day. So she was on her phone a lot and not paying attention to me, so I glanced at her screen from across the table and I saw what appeared to be a guys name that I didn't recognize and her sending a cleavage pic. When I asked what she was doing she quickly closed it out and pulled up a pic of her new belly button ring. When we got home and she fell asleep I was able to figure out her swipe pass code and I found a long thread with an ex of hers from high school that she hasn't spoken to in 15 yrs. At first it was a lot of catching up, talking about his kids, how he screwed up letting her go etc.. Then he started calling her beautiful and from there it got more sexual. My wife said he did things for her that I don't, and she also said I go out of town for work every few months. He sent her nude pics and she sent cleavage pics and pics of her face. This was way more than light flirting.
I also briefly saw her much shorter thread with another guy where he was talking dirty to her and asked for pics, for which my wife replied: use snapchat because it deletes the evidence. All she told me was that she knew if from back home. Unfortunately while hooking up to my pc to save all this I could not remember the pass code and was permanently locked out of her phone. She woke up and asked if I had seen her phone and I confronted her. She didn't try to deny it. She deleted everything off her phone so now I'll never know if it was just 2 guys. I can't believe a word she says and I fear that if I stay with her she is bound to cheat again.
I looked at the phone and text records and the talking to the 1st guy had started 5 days prior, which she told me before I got the records. Over 430 messages in 5 days, and 2 late night calls both over 20 minutes. To make matters worse I noticed another # showing up a lot and she told me it was a guy she works with that is just a friend. He is married and has 2 kids and yet they were texting a at late hrs of the night. Who does that? The 2 guys she was sexting with live on the other side of the country so definitely no physical contact. She swears the guy from work is a friend and said she was sexting the other guys because it made her feel good to be complimented and to have her ex tell her he screwed up was gratifying and provided closure. She has also gained a little weight the last coupe years and doesn't feel sexy anymore. I still think she's gorgeous and I can barely keep my hands off her. But I asked her why the hell she would delete her texts with the coworker if she had nothing to hide and she said " I didn't think I needed to defend every one of my conversations". Unbelievable!That would have given her some credibility.
I love her more than life itself and I thought our marriage was great. She swears she loves me and didn't mean to hurt me so bad. She says she is very happy with me and even told that to sexting guy #1 when he asked. I just don't understand why a happy wife would stray for some emotional attention. I think I am a great husband, although I could compliment her more and say sweet things more. I am so torn up right now and of course I can't talk to anyone about this. My trust in her is broken and I don't know if it can ever be repaired. I am just looking for advice from people that have gone through this. Thanks for reading this long diatribe.
Put the internet to work for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment