While reading these little articles that tell you when to call it quits in a relationship. I always feel very depressed when reading them. Here is one I'll use as an example
1. You're Only Staying Because Of Religion
Right on. I think religion both pressures me and give me some strength to stick it out.
2. Your Needs Aren't Being Met
When considering Maslow's hierarchy of needs, yep love, safety self-esteem all missing or very low.
3. You've Lost Respect For Your Partner
I do respecter her. She doesn't have any ambitions or goals so I wouldn't say I look up to her.
4. Your Partner's Behavior Is Difficult Or Dangerous
No problems with this one.
5. You No Longer Feel Sexually Attracted
Sadly this one is true. Physical apperance does play a small roll, I'm a guy. I'd say other things like a poor sex life and lack of confidence, flirting etc. contribute moe to this.
6. You Have A Hard Time Forgiving
Maybe. Nothing big or bad has happen like cheating. I'd say maybe she cheats on me with the kids or lack of making herself available to me.
7. You No Longer Have Fun Together
We have little in common. So yeah this is a problem.
8. Long Term Goals No Longer Match
She doesn't have any long term goals.
So I read these things and I literally feel sick. I feel like I've made a huge mistake in who I've married. The fist 10 years were, I'd say normal. Up and down. No real problems. The last 4 years I've just felt worse.
I am selfish. I'll be honest. I want to be happy. I want more than she can/has provided.
Why I'm still in the relationship:
I think I can be happy. We have 3 kids. I believe our marriage is eternal, and I thing even if a majority of our marriage here on earth suck, it will be better in the afterlife.
Advice? Am I just letting myself be overly influenced with negative suggestions by reading articles such as this? I think if put my mind to it I can turn myself around and be positive and move forward, but should I? Abuse aside, Is there a point where I should brake it off and move on?
Other info:
Married 14 years, 3 kids. We did weekly marriage counseling for a year. While things did get better while we went, it ended with him saying "Foe some people counseling wont' help"
1. You're Only Staying Because Of Religion
Right on. I think religion both pressures me and give me some strength to stick it out.
2. Your Needs Aren't Being Met
When considering Maslow's hierarchy of needs, yep love, safety self-esteem all missing or very low.
3. You've Lost Respect For Your Partner
I do respecter her. She doesn't have any ambitions or goals so I wouldn't say I look up to her.
4. Your Partner's Behavior Is Difficult Or Dangerous
No problems with this one.
5. You No Longer Feel Sexually Attracted
Sadly this one is true. Physical apperance does play a small roll, I'm a guy. I'd say other things like a poor sex life and lack of confidence, flirting etc. contribute moe to this.
6. You Have A Hard Time Forgiving
Maybe. Nothing big or bad has happen like cheating. I'd say maybe she cheats on me with the kids or lack of making herself available to me.
7. You No Longer Have Fun Together
We have little in common. So yeah this is a problem.
8. Long Term Goals No Longer Match
She doesn't have any long term goals.
So I read these things and I literally feel sick. I feel like I've made a huge mistake in who I've married. The fist 10 years were, I'd say normal. Up and down. No real problems. The last 4 years I've just felt worse.
I am selfish. I'll be honest. I want to be happy. I want more than she can/has provided.
Why I'm still in the relationship:
I think I can be happy. We have 3 kids. I believe our marriage is eternal, and I thing even if a majority of our marriage here on earth suck, it will be better in the afterlife.
Advice? Am I just letting myself be overly influenced with negative suggestions by reading articles such as this? I think if put my mind to it I can turn myself around and be positive and move forward, but should I? Abuse aside, Is there a point where I should brake it off and move on?
Other info:
Married 14 years, 3 kids. We did weekly marriage counseling for a year. While things did get better while we went, it ended with him saying "Foe some people counseling wont' help"
Put the internet to work for you.
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