Last night my wife and I get into an argument about "expecting" sex. It had been 3 days since we were intimate. We usually average every 2-3 days. Sometimes it's 4 sometimes it's a couple days in a row. Anyway. I had initiated the night before and was sorta blown off, so I'm thinking she knows I want it. I played with her a little before work, and she says tonight we have to get the kids in bed early. GREAT! Send her a naughty snapchat at work. Every thing's ok. Get home, we go grocery shopping and she mentions a pain. I ask about it. She says it's not too bad more uncomfortable. So we get in bed later and nothing.
Admittedly, I'm pissed at this point. I know I shouldn't be or at least not show it but I am and I do. My fault there. Then she goes off on I always "expect" sex, makes it feel like a job, she's not in the mood because of the pain mentioned earlier, that she needs a couple of days between to recharge. Which is why we average 2-3 days between. She wants it to be spontaneous and natural, not scheduled. Natural to me would be every day so it's going to be unnatural for one of us. She never mentioned the pain being to a point where sex would not be enjoyable. She's mentioned headaches and the like before but if I said something about not having sex that night her answer would be, "oh we're doing it" and it didn't seem sarcastic or like she was relenting to sex. If I had known the pain was the reason, not a problem. If it hurts too bad to do it, I don't want to do it. But she didn't tell me.
Now I guess my question is was I "expecting" sex as in I thought we should do it no matter what, or did I anticipate sex and was disappointed by nothing with no explanation. Should she have explained or should I just have let it go? How do you not expect sex when the whole day you've been led to believe it's coming?
Admittedly, I'm pissed at this point. I know I shouldn't be or at least not show it but I am and I do. My fault there. Then she goes off on I always "expect" sex, makes it feel like a job, she's not in the mood because of the pain mentioned earlier, that she needs a couple of days between to recharge. Which is why we average 2-3 days between. She wants it to be spontaneous and natural, not scheduled. Natural to me would be every day so it's going to be unnatural for one of us. She never mentioned the pain being to a point where sex would not be enjoyable. She's mentioned headaches and the like before but if I said something about not having sex that night her answer would be, "oh we're doing it" and it didn't seem sarcastic or like she was relenting to sex. If I had known the pain was the reason, not a problem. If it hurts too bad to do it, I don't want to do it. But she didn't tell me.
Now I guess my question is was I "expecting" sex as in I thought we should do it no matter what, or did I anticipate sex and was disappointed by nothing with no explanation. Should she have explained or should I just have let it go? How do you not expect sex when the whole day you've been led to believe it's coming?
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