Hello. I have been reading on this forum for a few months & finally feel ready for some advice. (hopefully)
Here is my story: I have been married to my husband for 10 months. We have lived together for 4 years. (we were together previously but broke up/got back together etc)
I am absolutely miserable. Since we have lived together we rarely have sex. I mean every 1-2 months. I am very sexual I have talked to him many many times about the fact that I need to have sex more. I need that intimacy & to feel wanted. His reasoning is that he is pretty much lazy. I know that he masturbates/watched porn because he has admitted to it.
And when we DO have sex we don't even kiss. There is VERY little foreplay & no consideration for me. I feel basically like a blow up doll he gets out and dusts off every now and then. It is not a good feeling.
Before we got married we had these issues also. I had major anxiety about getting married. But when it came down to it, he is a nice guy, good job, does love me...we had everything planned etc. I see now that I wasn't having cold feet but it was my gut telling me to not do it.
There are plenty of other issues too but this is the one that makes me feel absolutely horrible & had me here asking for advice.
I have asked him to go to counseling and he refuses.
I am just scared that everyone will blame me if we get divorced because he is so NICE & a good provider. No one knows the truth behind it.
Is it too much that I want to feel wanted & have a passion between me and my husband? I am 32 and would still like to have children. I just don't see it happening with him...
Any advice is much appreciated!!!
Here is my story: I have been married to my husband for 10 months. We have lived together for 4 years. (we were together previously but broke up/got back together etc)
I am absolutely miserable. Since we have lived together we rarely have sex. I mean every 1-2 months. I am very sexual I have talked to him many many times about the fact that I need to have sex more. I need that intimacy & to feel wanted. His reasoning is that he is pretty much lazy. I know that he masturbates/watched porn because he has admitted to it.
And when we DO have sex we don't even kiss. There is VERY little foreplay & no consideration for me. I feel basically like a blow up doll he gets out and dusts off every now and then. It is not a good feeling.
Before we got married we had these issues also. I had major anxiety about getting married. But when it came down to it, he is a nice guy, good job, does love me...we had everything planned etc. I see now that I wasn't having cold feet but it was my gut telling me to not do it.
There are plenty of other issues too but this is the one that makes me feel absolutely horrible & had me here asking for advice.
I have asked him to go to counseling and he refuses.
I am just scared that everyone will blame me if we get divorced because he is so NICE & a good provider. No one knows the truth behind it.
Is it too much that I want to feel wanted & have a passion between me and my husband? I am 32 and would still like to have children. I just don't see it happening with him...
Any advice is much appreciated!!!
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