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3 Months Known & Still Not Good

Hi,
I discovered my WW affairs 3 months ago. I am distressed that I am still in such a bad way. I can't focus on work, I work for myself so this could be a big problem), all I do is go to coffee shops and cruise sites like this obsessively. I hate it when my ww is happy. It's like I take it that she is being ****y and waving her attitude in my face. We are supposed to go on a vacation in 2 weeks and after I come back I am seriously going to think of a divorce. I have not yet because I was in such a bad way and am finally at a point where my skin is not crawling and I can at least sleep for 4 or 5 hours straight. Others have told me not to rush to a decision while I was hurting so much and wait, there was no rush. Good days are just bad with constant bad thoughts and movies and the bad days are when I break down.
Even if I felt like a got a sufficient remorseful response I am not sure I would be able to deal with it.
Stats:
me 57
WW 52
Married & together 13 years
WW affairs that I know about in last year
2 I am sure about, 1 90% sure.
She confessed to the last one but lies to me about others
She is acting like a great wife at the moment

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