My boyfriend and I have been dating for two years and a few months now. We met in college, and we're 21 years old.
We had sex pretty early in our relationship. He had no problem getting it up, but he did often have a problem of cuming way too fast! I am the only sexual partner that he has ever had. When we first had sex, he came almost instantly; it was definitely under a minute. However, I thought that was to be expected because he was very turned on, a virgin, and condomless (extremely stupid, I know). Anyway, there was some infidelity on his part. He was obsessed with looking at other girls, especially my roommates. We had major trust issues because of it, but just this past summer, I began to completely move past it (at about 19 months of dating). So from the about three months of dating to about twenty six months of dating, we had a very healthy sex life (sex almost every day). In the first three months, he struggled with lasting more than about ten minutes. He eventually got the hang of it, it seemed.
Then, At about twenty six months of dating, my boyfriend looked at my roommate again (not the same person)! This time, he masturbated while fantasizing about my roommate and her boyfriend having sex AND he drooled over her while she was wearing a very skanky Halloween costume (I was standing right next to him while he drooled -___-) I know you're thinking he's a douche, but I do love him. Our relationship besides this is very good. That's not the point here. So after this most recent incident, I became ENRAGED!! I cried constantly for about two weeks. We argued endlessly. Meanwhile, exams and classes were getting tougher. So we were both very stressed out.
Ever since that enormous fight, he can't get it up! He will be hard for a little while, but then he goes soft immediately and before any penetration can occur. He is now calling this "sexual anxiety". He says it's because he was stressed out from exams and upset and guilty about the fighting. I have not been very nice about this either. I get very pissed off when he can't get hard. My thinking is, "you like these hoes, but you can't perform for me?" However, he swears that isn't the case. I have asked him countless times if he's gay. He swears he isn't gay, and that he loves me and only has eyes for me. He says he's done with all the bullshit and that he wants to commit to me. Yet he goes soft no matter what. I am very physically attractive. I exercise about 5 days a week. I am more than willing to be a great sex partner. I do fellatio, hand jobs, any position I can stretch into. EVERYTHING! He always goes soft. He is claiming that it's because he now has "sexual anxiety". I really don't know what to think.
I recently made a huge mistake and I cheated on him too. I felt pissed off because of his past actions; I felt sexually frustrated. I did a webcam tease for a random on the internet. Now my boyfriend is saying he has even more performance anxiety. What I did was totally messed up. I know that, and I've apologized endlessly. Since then, we've made up. However, that same sex anxiety is still there. Does anyone out there have any suggestions? My boyfriend has tried PC exercises and breathing exercises. I drag his butt to exercise with me now. He eats over at my place usually; so I know he doesn't eat crap all the time. Please help. I really desire sex in a relationship. I fear that this is ruining our relationship and causing doubts. Please help!
Thanks in advance, especially if you had the patience to read all of this #^_^#
We had sex pretty early in our relationship. He had no problem getting it up, but he did often have a problem of cuming way too fast! I am the only sexual partner that he has ever had. When we first had sex, he came almost instantly; it was definitely under a minute. However, I thought that was to be expected because he was very turned on, a virgin, and condomless (extremely stupid, I know). Anyway, there was some infidelity on his part. He was obsessed with looking at other girls, especially my roommates. We had major trust issues because of it, but just this past summer, I began to completely move past it (at about 19 months of dating). So from the about three months of dating to about twenty six months of dating, we had a very healthy sex life (sex almost every day). In the first three months, he struggled with lasting more than about ten minutes. He eventually got the hang of it, it seemed.
Then, At about twenty six months of dating, my boyfriend looked at my roommate again (not the same person)! This time, he masturbated while fantasizing about my roommate and her boyfriend having sex AND he drooled over her while she was wearing a very skanky Halloween costume (I was standing right next to him while he drooled -___-) I know you're thinking he's a douche, but I do love him. Our relationship besides this is very good. That's not the point here. So after this most recent incident, I became ENRAGED!! I cried constantly for about two weeks. We argued endlessly. Meanwhile, exams and classes were getting tougher. So we were both very stressed out.
Ever since that enormous fight, he can't get it up! He will be hard for a little while, but then he goes soft immediately and before any penetration can occur. He is now calling this "sexual anxiety". He says it's because he was stressed out from exams and upset and guilty about the fighting. I have not been very nice about this either. I get very pissed off when he can't get hard. My thinking is, "you like these hoes, but you can't perform for me?" However, he swears that isn't the case. I have asked him countless times if he's gay. He swears he isn't gay, and that he loves me and only has eyes for me. He says he's done with all the bullshit and that he wants to commit to me. Yet he goes soft no matter what. I am very physically attractive. I exercise about 5 days a week. I am more than willing to be a great sex partner. I do fellatio, hand jobs, any position I can stretch into. EVERYTHING! He always goes soft. He is claiming that it's because he now has "sexual anxiety". I really don't know what to think.
I recently made a huge mistake and I cheated on him too. I felt pissed off because of his past actions; I felt sexually frustrated. I did a webcam tease for a random on the internet. Now my boyfriend is saying he has even more performance anxiety. What I did was totally messed up. I know that, and I've apologized endlessly. Since then, we've made up. However, that same sex anxiety is still there. Does anyone out there have any suggestions? My boyfriend has tried PC exercises and breathing exercises. I drag his butt to exercise with me now. He eats over at my place usually; so I know he doesn't eat crap all the time. Please help. I really desire sex in a relationship. I fear that this is ruining our relationship and causing doubts. Please help!
Thanks in advance, especially if you had the patience to read all of this #^_^#
Put the internet to work for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment