I woke up at 6:30 yesterday morning and not long after waking I heard the buzz buzz that I usually hear when I get a text and my phone is on vibrate. I checked my phone and no message. Not long after I heard it again, in the same amount of time mine usually goes off as a reminder if I haven't checked the text. Again I pick up my phone and nothing. Several minutes later I hear it again and no text. My heart sinks. It sounds like another phone is in the bedroom. Hubby is up watching sports news with his phone in the living room, so wtf?
We have been in R for a year and 2 months. Done MC, full transparency (that I know of at least) and he says and does everything right as far as I can tell. We had an incident in July where he broke NC with the OW for a 15 minute meeting so he could get something for his friend. I had secret gps on his truck and VAR so I know pretty well that nothing happened, unless it was quick in her car, which is possible of course. But didn't seem so. I confronted him about it and let him know, if I find out he so much as waved at her on the street I am done. And I mean it.
I held on to my phone and waited for the reminder buzz so I would know for sure if it was my phone. I heard the buzz and it was not my phone. So I started searching. Under the bed, under the mattress, in the pillow case, under the sheet, under the lamp. I heard it again. Still couldn't find it. So infuriating. I stayed in the room for a half hour waiting and praying it would buzz again so I could find it. I know WH met with OW during the A in the early morning because he's an early riser and I sleep in. Or did before our son was born. So the timing fits with a possible planned meet with OW. Or a request from her. He used to get up at 6:30 and go out about 7 and the first 3 texts were about 6:30 so I waited till 7 and sure enough, it went off again. I kept moving around the room trying to pinpoint where it was coming from. In the middle of two buzzes, WH walks in. Asks me why I'm standing behind the door. I made up an excuse because if there is something going on its underground and I want to find out. I was hoping he'd leave before the reminder buzz so I could keep looking and he wouldn't know I heard it. He didn't. It went off and he asked me who would be texting me so early. He thought it was my phone. When I told him it wasn't he asked what it was then and I think was genuinely confused, but he was an amazing liar during the A (aren't they all) so who knows. I'm sure if he did have a phone in there he didn't know it was on vibrate. He started looking around trying to figure out what it was (or acting that out very well). We are in a basement apartment so I suggested it could be coming from upstairs. Not convinced of that by any means, but don't want him knowing I'm suspicious.
So then the heat comes on and we smell cigarette smoke. We have problems with the people upstairs smoking when they aren't supposed to be. He got mad and started yelling about that and went up to complain, made and huge deal about it. This isn't unusual as he does this whenever they smoke in the house, but I can't help thinking it could've been a distraction.
Unfortunately I also got distracted by the baby at the same time, because I had planned on watching him like a hawk to see if he tried to retrieve a phone. When he showered later I searched the room again and also did a thorough search of his truck. I thought he'd have it there because he doesn't think I have a key to his truck and since I acted very well as if I wasn't suspicious at all he'd be less likely to think I'd take his keys to check. I didn't find a phone or charger anywhere.
I guess there is some possibility it was a phone from upstairs. The bedroom is directly above ours and I can hear them cough or even clearly hear them speaking at times. I thought for sure I'd find that phone in his truck, if anywhere. If he does have one, vibrate has been turned off for sure. How can I catch him if he's this underground? I have secret gps in his gym bag that he carries pretty much everywhere. I use VARs whenever I think there's something suspicious or just for random checks. I can read all his emails, facebook messages and texts, from my laptop without him knowing. But he does suspect I can because when I first caught him through his texts I quoted it to him. I hadn't found TAM yet so when I saw a text to OW saying "If you want to find a dark spot somewhere I need to know so I can sneak out and get back by 10." I was so livid I texted him that we were done, over and called him all the names that fit. He acted bewildered and like I was crazy (don't they all) and asked where that was coming from. I told him to go to a dark spot and think about it. That spurred several calls to OW, I assume to accuse her of telling me, since he had no idea how I knew. He's made comments that I can probably see all his texts but he doesn't know for sure.
So the point is, if he's doing it, it's going to be hard to catch and I need all the help I can get.
We have been in R for a year and 2 months. Done MC, full transparency (that I know of at least) and he says and does everything right as far as I can tell. We had an incident in July where he broke NC with the OW for a 15 minute meeting so he could get something for his friend. I had secret gps on his truck and VAR so I know pretty well that nothing happened, unless it was quick in her car, which is possible of course. But didn't seem so. I confronted him about it and let him know, if I find out he so much as waved at her on the street I am done. And I mean it.
I held on to my phone and waited for the reminder buzz so I would know for sure if it was my phone. I heard the buzz and it was not my phone. So I started searching. Under the bed, under the mattress, in the pillow case, under the sheet, under the lamp. I heard it again. Still couldn't find it. So infuriating. I stayed in the room for a half hour waiting and praying it would buzz again so I could find it. I know WH met with OW during the A in the early morning because he's an early riser and I sleep in. Or did before our son was born. So the timing fits with a possible planned meet with OW. Or a request from her. He used to get up at 6:30 and go out about 7 and the first 3 texts were about 6:30 so I waited till 7 and sure enough, it went off again. I kept moving around the room trying to pinpoint where it was coming from. In the middle of two buzzes, WH walks in. Asks me why I'm standing behind the door. I made up an excuse because if there is something going on its underground and I want to find out. I was hoping he'd leave before the reminder buzz so I could keep looking and he wouldn't know I heard it. He didn't. It went off and he asked me who would be texting me so early. He thought it was my phone. When I told him it wasn't he asked what it was then and I think was genuinely confused, but he was an amazing liar during the A (aren't they all) so who knows. I'm sure if he did have a phone in there he didn't know it was on vibrate. He started looking around trying to figure out what it was (or acting that out very well). We are in a basement apartment so I suggested it could be coming from upstairs. Not convinced of that by any means, but don't want him knowing I'm suspicious.
So then the heat comes on and we smell cigarette smoke. We have problems with the people upstairs smoking when they aren't supposed to be. He got mad and started yelling about that and went up to complain, made and huge deal about it. This isn't unusual as he does this whenever they smoke in the house, but I can't help thinking it could've been a distraction.
Unfortunately I also got distracted by the baby at the same time, because I had planned on watching him like a hawk to see if he tried to retrieve a phone. When he showered later I searched the room again and also did a thorough search of his truck. I thought he'd have it there because he doesn't think I have a key to his truck and since I acted very well as if I wasn't suspicious at all he'd be less likely to think I'd take his keys to check. I didn't find a phone or charger anywhere.
I guess there is some possibility it was a phone from upstairs. The bedroom is directly above ours and I can hear them cough or even clearly hear them speaking at times. I thought for sure I'd find that phone in his truck, if anywhere. If he does have one, vibrate has been turned off for sure. How can I catch him if he's this underground? I have secret gps in his gym bag that he carries pretty much everywhere. I use VARs whenever I think there's something suspicious or just for random checks. I can read all his emails, facebook messages and texts, from my laptop without him knowing. But he does suspect I can because when I first caught him through his texts I quoted it to him. I hadn't found TAM yet so when I saw a text to OW saying "If you want to find a dark spot somewhere I need to know so I can sneak out and get back by 10." I was so livid I texted him that we were done, over and called him all the names that fit. He acted bewildered and like I was crazy (don't they all) and asked where that was coming from. I told him to go to a dark spot and think about it. That spurred several calls to OW, I assume to accuse her of telling me, since he had no idea how I knew. He's made comments that I can probably see all his texts but he doesn't know for sure.
So the point is, if he's doing it, it's going to be hard to catch and I need all the help I can get.
Put the internet to work for you.
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