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How to appreciate what you have

I have been having trouble recently with the fact that I'm allowing my own insecurities from my own past to interfere with my present and potentially ruin the best relationship that I've ever had. I've met my dream girl and she's as into me as I am into her. I made a firm resolution to completely stop all the self destructive thinking that was clouding my mind and focus on us and what we have together.

So I called her up on Thursday night and asked if she was interested in a surprise date even though we were supposed to go out Friday. She hesitated a little because it was such short notice but agreed (we made things work with childcare for her daughter).

Even though we really weren't dressed for it I took her to one of the best restaurants in town and just talked to her about life in general and her life specifically. I really wanted to get to know her even more than I already did. And I wanted to treat her. She said she wasn't dressed for something like this but I said she put all the other women there to shame and she needed a break from her (somewhat) hectic life. Things got very romantic very fast and she told me how much she appreciated this.

I took her for a walk near the river after and told her how happy I've been since I met her. She said she's been feeling the same way. We agreed that we were going to work to make us work. Everything was just so damn perfect. We were freezing but that kind of made it better in some way. I had an amazing woman on my arm.

We didn't jump in bed later because we both have work but she was practically in tears when I kissed her goodnight because she hadn't been treated to anything in a while. Can't wait for tonight. I really wanted her to know that I want her and only her.

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