Hi, I am new here but I really need people's advice that are not from the church nor real friends of mine. Here's my story: (I'll try to make it as short as possible)
I really feel unappreciated by my husband. I feel like, like how Alpha-males feel, if I advice him to do something, he'd resist because he felt being dictated. Even to his sister and mom, he's like that. Anyway, I was assigned by my church group to manage the our performance for the coming Christmas party. I chose the song 'o Holy night'. I told him only me and another elderly member will have a solo and the rest will sing together. Anyway. when I was trying to practice with him. I sang my part, while he sings his part (since the rest of the group are not with us). I can see in his reaction every time I'd ask him to sing this part, he'd not give his effort and that he'd whine and make excuses. Then, as I try to wave my hand and ask him to sing after me, he then suddenly said "these people are best to do the coaching". Hey, first of, I am not trying to level myself to those music coach. Those people he mentioned are not in the same group, why would he bring that up? I am not t rying to be a "coach" as in by profession and talent per se, I was just practicing my lines and his lines. I am dictating how he should sing it, never mentioned a word about 'this is how you're supposed to sing is' etc. I don't know, I was hurt because I know him. I don't feel so appreciated, not just in this particular case but in many cases in our 14 year marriage. Why would he indirectly compare me to those coach and would prefer them over me, that is not even an issue. Anyway, I just want to pour this out. If anyone wants to give advice, comments, please feel free. Thanks.
I really feel unappreciated by my husband. I feel like, like how Alpha-males feel, if I advice him to do something, he'd resist because he felt being dictated. Even to his sister and mom, he's like that. Anyway, I was assigned by my church group to manage the our performance for the coming Christmas party. I chose the song 'o Holy night'. I told him only me and another elderly member will have a solo and the rest will sing together. Anyway. when I was trying to practice with him. I sang my part, while he sings his part (since the rest of the group are not with us). I can see in his reaction every time I'd ask him to sing this part, he'd not give his effort and that he'd whine and make excuses. Then, as I try to wave my hand and ask him to sing after me, he then suddenly said "these people are best to do the coaching". Hey, first of, I am not trying to level myself to those music coach. Those people he mentioned are not in the same group, why would he bring that up? I am not t rying to be a "coach" as in by profession and talent per se, I was just practicing my lines and his lines. I am dictating how he should sing it, never mentioned a word about 'this is how you're supposed to sing is' etc. I don't know, I was hurt because I know him. I don't feel so appreciated, not just in this particular case but in many cases in our 14 year marriage. Why would he indirectly compare me to those coach and would prefer them over me, that is not even an issue. Anyway, I just want to pour this out. If anyone wants to give advice, comments, please feel free. Thanks.
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