Well, I hate to say it but she left july 1st which I was under the impression I had a chance to make things right by not drinking and getting my act together.
July was a hard month for me every time I asked all I was told is I do not know and that was for everything! Drove me nuts as I did not know where I stood. She made me feel that there was a chance if I changed my ways.
All I know is last week I asked if she filed and she said i started the process. i just picked up the papers the other day.
I talked to her last night finally and said look i need closure cause i am still in love with you. She told me she no longer loves me... I said so you knew this for months then? Basically was my answer..
I said well that was nice to know this a month ago when i was going insane right? she is like sorry. i said well if i had no chance and asked if there was one instead of I do not know should have been NO.
So now i am in depression somewhat, i can function but my god all i think about is our memories over the years and cannot turn that switch off. i put all pictures away and stuff that reminds me of her.
The other thing that sucks is listening to the radio or music cause more than likely we were good when that song came out. Same thing with tv and movies- i do not like to watch movies from past years cause i am reminded of her.
I accept she does not love me i get that but not how to forget and stop remenising past memories. Seems she moved on from me very fast but i do not want to be like this for weeks or even days!
All my friends are married and have kids no single friends. I try to keep busy but man does this suck! Not sure if it is too soon to start looking for dates but after 14 years not sure how to anymore lol...
any advice? was thinking match.com or eharmony as bar girls are not what i want.
July was a hard month for me every time I asked all I was told is I do not know and that was for everything! Drove me nuts as I did not know where I stood. She made me feel that there was a chance if I changed my ways.
All I know is last week I asked if she filed and she said i started the process. i just picked up the papers the other day.
I talked to her last night finally and said look i need closure cause i am still in love with you. She told me she no longer loves me... I said so you knew this for months then? Basically was my answer..
I said well that was nice to know this a month ago when i was going insane right? she is like sorry. i said well if i had no chance and asked if there was one instead of I do not know should have been NO.
So now i am in depression somewhat, i can function but my god all i think about is our memories over the years and cannot turn that switch off. i put all pictures away and stuff that reminds me of her.
The other thing that sucks is listening to the radio or music cause more than likely we were good when that song came out. Same thing with tv and movies- i do not like to watch movies from past years cause i am reminded of her.
I accept she does not love me i get that but not how to forget and stop remenising past memories. Seems she moved on from me very fast but i do not want to be like this for weeks or even days!
All my friends are married and have kids no single friends. I try to keep busy but man does this suck! Not sure if it is too soon to start looking for dates but after 14 years not sure how to anymore lol...
any advice? was thinking match.com or eharmony as bar girls are not what i want.
Put the internet to work for you.
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