Hey everyone,
I got separated last year and since then I don't really know what to do with my life anymore. I'm stuck and need help. I am struggling with what is logical vs what might make me happier.
Bit about myself and my current situation.... I am 25 years old, been working at this company for 7 years now. It's a great job, with great pay, stable, full benefits and the people are amazing. I don't have any post secondary education but I am a bilingual (en and fr). My ex and I bought a house together last year. It's a great house in a great neighborhood and we got an amazing deal on it. I have 2 years left of the mortgage to go. Shortly after we bought the house, I came home one day and she moved out. Long story short, she was unhappy. You can read more in another thread I wrote called the hell of divorce. Anyways, although she moved out, she didn't want to rush the legal stuff, but I am the type of guy that gets things down now and not tomorrow, so I took initiative and petitioned for divorce. In Canada, you have to wait 1 year from the separation date before you can divorce. So the time has almost come. Normally when you petition for divorce, the responding party has 6 0 days to respond. I petitioned so that the property defaults to me and she did not respond. So basically the house is mine. I never supported her and we don't have kids. My agreement was to pay her a one time cheque that covers the downpayment for the house and a little more for other stuff.
When she had moved out, she went to stay with a friend in the city. It was easy to communicate with her. Now she has quit her job, left the province and I am limbo. She hasn't signed anything and I feel that she won't. It's okay though, she didn't respond to the petition. She also has little money, no family and very very few friends where as I have the opposite. In court, I know I will win although I highly doubt it will get to court (or so says my lawyer).
So yeah. Prior to all this crap, my goal was to keep working at my job, buy a house, get married, start a business on the side (still in the process of raising capital) and start having kids. Now I don't know what to do. The basement flooded this year and it seems it's due to an old wooden window frame. Plans are to fix that this summer, but the stress was so high that if it floods again next year (meaning it's the foundation), I want out. the responsibilities of owning a house take a lot of my time and the costs are pretty high. I have a couple renters now, so it pays itself, but still. I also feel depressed in this house. We were suppost to share it. I feel like moving out would help with the pain.
I've lived in my current city the majority of my life. I have a great network of friends, and in particular a handful of really awesome friends. My friends and I play and record music and lately I've been getting more and more involved with audio engineering. My family is small and they all live in the city too. They have my support to do whatever, but I struggle just leaving everyone behind.
I'm an extremely liberal pagan hippy and am getting really tired of living in a city where the majority is conservative bible-thumpers and cowboys. There are less than 200,000 ppl here and I am really tired of this place.
Moving and starting fresh is difficult, I get that. My struggle is I don't really know where to go and I have a ton of crap to take with me.
Here is my dream city:
1) Primarily liberal city with a large and active pagan community. Cannabis is generally accepted.
2) A vibrant, cultural and large music scene. I am not a dancer but I like the nightlife. I play several instruments and I love jazz and death metal.
3) Plenty of dating options. I think I want to live somewhere with +400,000 ppl minimum.
4) Ideally in Canada, but I am open to suggestions. My current thoughts are somewhere near Vancouver BC, Quebec city, Seattle WA, Humboldt County CA, Boulder CO or Eugene OR or Portland OR.
Thanks for reading!!
I got separated last year and since then I don't really know what to do with my life anymore. I'm stuck and need help. I am struggling with what is logical vs what might make me happier.
Bit about myself and my current situation.... I am 25 years old, been working at this company for 7 years now. It's a great job, with great pay, stable, full benefits and the people are amazing. I don't have any post secondary education but I am a bilingual (en and fr). My ex and I bought a house together last year. It's a great house in a great neighborhood and we got an amazing deal on it. I have 2 years left of the mortgage to go. Shortly after we bought the house, I came home one day and she moved out. Long story short, she was unhappy. You can read more in another thread I wrote called the hell of divorce. Anyways, although she moved out, she didn't want to rush the legal stuff, but I am the type of guy that gets things down now and not tomorrow, so I took initiative and petitioned for divorce. In Canada, you have to wait 1 year from the separation date before you can divorce. So the time has almost come. Normally when you petition for divorce, the responding party has 6 0 days to respond. I petitioned so that the property defaults to me and she did not respond. So basically the house is mine. I never supported her and we don't have kids. My agreement was to pay her a one time cheque that covers the downpayment for the house and a little more for other stuff.
When she had moved out, she went to stay with a friend in the city. It was easy to communicate with her. Now she has quit her job, left the province and I am limbo. She hasn't signed anything and I feel that she won't. It's okay though, she didn't respond to the petition. She also has little money, no family and very very few friends where as I have the opposite. In court, I know I will win although I highly doubt it will get to court (or so says my lawyer).
So yeah. Prior to all this crap, my goal was to keep working at my job, buy a house, get married, start a business on the side (still in the process of raising capital) and start having kids. Now I don't know what to do. The basement flooded this year and it seems it's due to an old wooden window frame. Plans are to fix that this summer, but the stress was so high that if it floods again next year (meaning it's the foundation), I want out. the responsibilities of owning a house take a lot of my time and the costs are pretty high. I have a couple renters now, so it pays itself, but still. I also feel depressed in this house. We were suppost to share it. I feel like moving out would help with the pain.
I've lived in my current city the majority of my life. I have a great network of friends, and in particular a handful of really awesome friends. My friends and I play and record music and lately I've been getting more and more involved with audio engineering. My family is small and they all live in the city too. They have my support to do whatever, but I struggle just leaving everyone behind.
I'm an extremely liberal pagan hippy and am getting really tired of living in a city where the majority is conservative bible-thumpers and cowboys. There are less than 200,000 ppl here and I am really tired of this place.
Moving and starting fresh is difficult, I get that. My struggle is I don't really know where to go and I have a ton of crap to take with me.
Here is my dream city:
1) Primarily liberal city with a large and active pagan community. Cannabis is generally accepted.
2) A vibrant, cultural and large music scene. I am not a dancer but I like the nightlife. I play several instruments and I love jazz and death metal.
3) Plenty of dating options. I think I want to live somewhere with +400,000 ppl minimum.
4) Ideally in Canada, but I am open to suggestions. My current thoughts are somewhere near Vancouver BC, Quebec city, Seattle WA, Humboldt County CA, Boulder CO or Eugene OR or Portland OR.
Thanks for reading!!
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