So I've been divorced for a couple months, separated for 2 years. We hashed out a 50/50 (sort of) split and both signed off on it in our separation agreement - which of course is a legally binding document. I have the kids Wednesday after school until Sunday at 6 pm. She picks them up Sunday at 6 and has them until Wednesday morning (drops them off at school). So I have them more actually - she NEVER has them for a full day. I have them all Saturday and Sunday (until 6) and I get every second Friday off, so I have them all day those Fridays (they're off school at noon).
She has recently (a few months) got a new job at a bar in a town about 30 minutes away. Her boyfriend lives there as well (bouncer at her bar). She has been pushing to move the kids to this town as she hates the commute and wants to be close to her bf. I have said no - the kids love their school and friends, love being in the house they grew up in, my family all live within a few minutes etc.
A while ago she stated she wants a new arrangement: she moves the kids to this other town and they change schools. My days go down to only Saturday and Sunday and I would get holidays.So I'd lose Wednesday, Thursday and Friday - and the kicker is, they wouldn't even be with her (she goes to work before they get off school and works until late late night) - they would be at her PARENTS place. Her parents would have them from from 3 pm onward for Wednesday-Friday, instead of me.
Obviously I said no ****ING way. She has pushed and pushed on this, saying the time would be made up during the holidays. I can't take time off work on holidays - I get 1 day for the stats, that's it. She keeps saying "the amount of time is the same, just placed differently". She's not the best with arithmetic.
So I wouldn't see my kids for 5 days at a time and their primary care giver would HER PARENTS. I said absolutely not. She is hiring a lawyer and taking it to court. She has no money and declared bankruptcy a year ago. She said she'll get a loan to pay for a lawyer. But she's going through with it.
I've been at my job for 5 years and make $120k a year - a very stable job and the kids are super happy when with me. My folks are wealthy and said "we'll get the best custody lawyer in the city". My dad contacted his high powered attorney (not a custody guy) who has put me in touch with 2 high powered female custody lawyers.
So, there's that peace of mind, BUT. I'm scared to death I may lose my kids and only see them weekends. I am NOT a weekend dad. With her arrangement I would lose primary custody to her 2 idiot parents (red necks, and the ex mother in law is a self proclaimed "witch").
I'm praying no judge would grant this, but stranger things have happened. I am SO STRESSED OUT. And this wil bury her financially - she wants a high priced lawyer - will have to get a loan, and that will be super high interest because of her bankruptcy. My folks have said "whatever it takes - we'll fight this". But I admit it - I'm scared.
She has recently (a few months) got a new job at a bar in a town about 30 minutes away. Her boyfriend lives there as well (bouncer at her bar). She has been pushing to move the kids to this town as she hates the commute and wants to be close to her bf. I have said no - the kids love their school and friends, love being in the house they grew up in, my family all live within a few minutes etc.
A while ago she stated she wants a new arrangement: she moves the kids to this other town and they change schools. My days go down to only Saturday and Sunday and I would get holidays.So I'd lose Wednesday, Thursday and Friday - and the kicker is, they wouldn't even be with her (she goes to work before they get off school and works until late late night) - they would be at her PARENTS place. Her parents would have them from from 3 pm onward for Wednesday-Friday, instead of me.
Obviously I said no ****ING way. She has pushed and pushed on this, saying the time would be made up during the holidays. I can't take time off work on holidays - I get 1 day for the stats, that's it. She keeps saying "the amount of time is the same, just placed differently". She's not the best with arithmetic.
So I wouldn't see my kids for 5 days at a time and their primary care giver would HER PARENTS. I said absolutely not. She is hiring a lawyer and taking it to court. She has no money and declared bankruptcy a year ago. She said she'll get a loan to pay for a lawyer. But she's going through with it.
I've been at my job for 5 years and make $120k a year - a very stable job and the kids are super happy when with me. My folks are wealthy and said "we'll get the best custody lawyer in the city". My dad contacted his high powered attorney (not a custody guy) who has put me in touch with 2 high powered female custody lawyers.
So, there's that peace of mind, BUT. I'm scared to death I may lose my kids and only see them weekends. I am NOT a weekend dad. With her arrangement I would lose primary custody to her 2 idiot parents (red necks, and the ex mother in law is a self proclaimed "witch").
I'm praying no judge would grant this, but stranger things have happened. I am SO STRESSED OUT. And this wil bury her financially - she wants a high priced lawyer - will have to get a loan, and that will be super high interest because of her bankruptcy. My folks have said "whatever it takes - we'll fight this". But I admit it - I'm scared.
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