Hi all,
I am new to this forum and am in need of some advice. I am getting married in a few short months and am having some doubts about the marriage. We have been together for 3 years and have been engaged for 9 months. Our relationship has had it's ups and downs, and the downs have really gotten me thinking about our future. When we first started dating, I had some trust issues because he had a tendency to be super flirty with other girls, which made me uncomfortable. I confronted him about it and he made an effort to stop, but it is always in the back of my mind. He is extremely tight with money, and it seems we can't ever have a conversation about it without it turning into a fight. After we first got engaged, he would try to tell me that we couldn't register for gifts, have any showers, etc. because he thought all of that was unnecessary. It really bothered me that I couldn't even enjoy the process of getting married. We have figured out some things but we disagreed (and still d o) on alot of things pertaining to the wedding because of the price.
His family is also an issue. He is the oldest son in the family, so they tend to put him on a pedestal. It affects our relationship because I feel like his family comes first. He asks them for their opinion on things such as the wedding, our house, etc. and it makes me feel like he doesn't value my opinion at all. He also tends to lash out at me if I disagree with him on anything (even simple things like the best way to organize the kitchen...) because he is so used to his family always praising him.
I am a bit younger than he is and haven't quite gotten my financial situation figured out. And even though I do work two jobs and try to pay for as much as I can, he constantly makes me feel like I don't contribute and am mooching off of him.
These are just a few things that we are struggling with, so I am asking everyone for advice. Are these normal problems that people who are engaged/married deal with? Am I making a mountain out of a molehill or should I be concerned that these problems are enough to not go through with the wedding?
Thanks all
I am new to this forum and am in need of some advice. I am getting married in a few short months and am having some doubts about the marriage. We have been together for 3 years and have been engaged for 9 months. Our relationship has had it's ups and downs, and the downs have really gotten me thinking about our future. When we first started dating, I had some trust issues because he had a tendency to be super flirty with other girls, which made me uncomfortable. I confronted him about it and he made an effort to stop, but it is always in the back of my mind. He is extremely tight with money, and it seems we can't ever have a conversation about it without it turning into a fight. After we first got engaged, he would try to tell me that we couldn't register for gifts, have any showers, etc. because he thought all of that was unnecessary. It really bothered me that I couldn't even enjoy the process of getting married. We have figured out some things but we disagreed (and still d o) on alot of things pertaining to the wedding because of the price.
His family is also an issue. He is the oldest son in the family, so they tend to put him on a pedestal. It affects our relationship because I feel like his family comes first. He asks them for their opinion on things such as the wedding, our house, etc. and it makes me feel like he doesn't value my opinion at all. He also tends to lash out at me if I disagree with him on anything (even simple things like the best way to organize the kitchen...) because he is so used to his family always praising him.
I am a bit younger than he is and haven't quite gotten my financial situation figured out. And even though I do work two jobs and try to pay for as much as I can, he constantly makes me feel like I don't contribute and am mooching off of him.
These are just a few things that we are struggling with, so I am asking everyone for advice. Are these normal problems that people who are engaged/married deal with? Am I making a mountain out of a molehill or should I be concerned that these problems are enough to not go through with the wedding?
Thanks all
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