3 weeks ago my wife told me she wasn't happy & wanted a separation. She said this was the only way to save our marriage. I broke down like baby, cried, & told her she didn't have to do this. This was 2 days before a business trip to Korea. While in Korea, we chatted some & I began reading 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman. She did too. We had a couple of insightful chats, which were encouraging. I recognize my faults & where I had torpedoed our marriage. I wish I had read Gottman's book 2yrs ago. She also told me to write up a separation agreement. She has agreed to attempt to reconcile our marriage. Once I returned home, she took the kids on a camping trip with her family. I was left alone for 5 days. I had very limited communication with the kids. She "suggested" while she was gone I look for a new place to live. After 4 revisions to the separation agreement, we came to a workable document. But, it was not easy. She became infuriated with me to the point she had to remove herself from the house. Part of our agreement is to seek therapy. We had our 1st session tonight. She was totally disengaged, twirling her hair & staring out the window. She said she has basically quit caring. If I want it to work, I need to man up. After therapy, we had some dinner. I tried to communicate my feelings regarding how I feel she forced me into kids when I wasn't ready. She became enraged again. When we got home, I allowed her to calm down. I put our son to bed & tried to talk to her again. She immediately became furious once again. I told her I understand she has a lot of pent up anger, but every conversation can't be like this. I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm in the eye of a hurricane. There's so much pain. I've been so resentful towards her for so long. I move out in a week. I'm wondering if this anger & lashing out at me will de-escalate when I move out & we'll be able to have rational, relationship building c onversations? I would have thought 3 weeks apart would have been a decent cool down period, but I guess it wasn't.
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