EA and my husband

I need to get this out. D Day was Easter Sunday 2013. I stopped by the pharmacy to pick up my husbands prescription and noticed a man walking around watching me. He finally approached me and asked "are you ____'s wife." I answered yes and from that moment my life has not been the same. This man started by saying "I have something to tell you about my wife and your husband and you are not going to like it." Well to make a long story short my husband has been in an EA with a co-worker. They both work third shift together. They started out as eating lunch together and going out for a coffee (please note lunch break is approximately 2 am in the morning). I was not aware of this "friendship" and had never heard of her before. The OW husband had suspicions and caught them in the parking lot together during a coffee break back two months ago. (I don't now how this man knows this but he did say that his wife and my husband had not had SEX yet.) He threatened my husband and made a scene at their workplace. He told my husband that he would find me and make sure I knew what was going on. This man told me the date this occurred, his wife's cell number and asked me to go home and check my phone bill and I could see everything I needed to. I did just that. I immediately went home praying all they way that this man was just crazy and was wrong. After looking at the bills I found the first call to each other was the last week of November and they have been talking daily since. On the phone with each other approximately 15 hours a month. The calls were first thing in the morning right after I left for work, again late afternoon after he woke up and before I got home. Also it appears some texting right before their dinner breaks in the early morning. After ready this message board I realize I did this the wrong way. I confronted my husband. It was the hardest thing I ever did. He looked at me in complete shock but did not deny it. I took his phone and of course the history was already deleted. I call the OW in front of him and told her to stay away from my husband. We have been married 20 years and have two children. My husband told me he was very sorry and that he was going to talk to me about "all this". I want to believe him but I don't know what to believe. I wish he had come clean about this before I found out. The closest he came to telling me on his own was that he requested to change his schedule to day shift (he made this request a month ago) and thank goodness this is his last week working nights. When he requested the shift change he told me he had worked third shift long enough and needed to be home with his family. He is now telling me it was a way to break away from the OW and he wants to make our marriage work. Mostly I believe this; however I want to be sure and am extra cautious. I hate this!! I have never been the jealous type; I never in a million years thought my husband would cheat on me. Now I am second guessing everything; questioning my husband regarding every detail of his day. I am not sleeping and fearful that my job could be affected. I have been able to do very little at work this week because of my emotional state. I have hid it well from people around me but I have to figure out a way to function normally. This is the reason I am coming here with my story. I have no one to talk with. I have only talked with my husband and the OW husband who let me in on the "secret." I don't want our family and friends to find out. I have seen people in our past who have shared this type of stuff with those around them and then are able to reconcile and move on; however the other's in their lives never let it go. If you have gotten this far, Thank you and I hope you could make sense of my rambling. I hope my getting this out will help me mentally.

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