My Story

I was brought to this site because I googled "my wife doesn't love me anymore." I read some of the forums and saw there were a lot of people with the same problems I'm currently having. I decided to joing because I need to write my feelings down, get some feedback, and hopefully get back to the way things were. I've been married for 8 years. We have a 7g, 5g, and baby boy. Sex and our relationship has always been good. However, after our son was born my wife's sex drive went to zero. There was literally nothing I could do that would make her want to have sex. Some nights she would just take her panties off and say "just get it over with" and just lay there. I recently had a very high profile event for work where everyone brough their husband or wife. It was a black tie event and everyone was dressed up. I thought she would have a blast getting her hair done and picking out a dress. About a week before the event she said she wasn't going. I asked why and she said she just didn't want to go. I let her know this was going to make me look like a complete clown in front of my bosses and co-workers. I had already bought both our tickets and we were sitting with people we knew. I went to this event and endured questions throughout the night about my wife. Extremely embarassing. This was about 2 months ago and our relationship has been going downhill since. She stays at home, no job. We both agreed that her job was focus on raising our family while I worked. Well, the laundry is rarely done and I often find pizza ordered when I get home. That or some other BS dinner is cooked when we have plenty of groceries. She told me the other night she could go the rest of her life without sex but then said I never romance her. I've asked her what her idea of romance is and she says that I know but just refuse. I honestly have no idea. I tried cleaning the house, doing the dishes, making dinner, anything to help around the house. Nothing works. I'm now at the point where I don't want to do anything nice for her. I have a hard time even sleeping in the bed with her right now because I'm so unhappy. I'll probably sleep on the couch tonight. This week I stopped telling her I love her and she's followed suit. I think we're crashing and burning fast. We have a beautiful family and I don't want to lose it. I just can't bring myself to work something out with her because I'm just so mad and unhappy. I did find it funny that when I came home from work today that she had ordered pizza again. She always has a pizza just for me because I like a bunch of stuff on it which her and the girls don't like. Well, she had two cheese pizzas ordered tonight. So obviously she's showing she doesn't care. I don't want a failed marriage. I don't want my kids to go through a divorce. But I don't think I can live like this. I think I will have a heart attack from stress just trying to survive living with her. I never understood why some guys drink a lot but I can actually understand it now. They drink to numb the pain. It's not me but it makes sense. So clear now. I know I'm not perfect in this either. I can always improve things about myself and my actions. This is a theraputic action for me to just put this down and let you read this. I'm going to try and stay strong.

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