Hi,
It's been almost 2 years since my separation and about 7 months since my divorce was final.
Luckily I was able to push myself out of the grieving process with the help of friends and family. Once in a while I still have gloomy days in which I miss having a partner, not sure if I miss my exW or just having a life partner.
So my dilemma is the following:
I started dating and have met a few people I liked. I do feel that I'm very closed off emotionally. Usually when I meet someone I like we'll start dating, have lots of fun, but when I feel that the other person is expecting the relationship to get more serious I disengage immediately. I've actually been told by my dates that I don't let them love me(get close to me).
There was this one girl. We met about a year ago. I asked her out but she blew me off, well she stood me up 3 times in a row, so I shut that door. Recently she came around and we started going out. In a 2 month period we saw each other every weekend and we ended up being intimate. The thing is she said she wasn't into friends with benefits and that if we wanted to keep seeing each other we had to be in a serious relationship. I felt a little bit trapped and told her I wanted for us to know each other a little bit more. She basically said we knew each other enough and that being just friends would be pointless. So that friendship failed.
This last girl I really liked. The type of girl you feel a connection with. But that scares me now. That's what I felt with my exW when we met and eventually we ended up divorced. It's been 2 weeks since I last saw her and I'm feeling down. It's like I want to reach out and see her but when I realize I have to commit I start seeing all the red flags and uncertainty creeps in, so I've done my best to stay away.
So my questions are: Is it that I am closed off emotionally to any potential new partner? or Am I more critical of who I will share my emotions with because of the failure of my marriage? and for those of you that have more experience. Will I ever be able to love again and let myself be loved? How do you know when it's the right person(I thought my exW was)?
Thanks in advance.
Providence.
It's been almost 2 years since my separation and about 7 months since my divorce was final.
Luckily I was able to push myself out of the grieving process with the help of friends and family. Once in a while I still have gloomy days in which I miss having a partner, not sure if I miss my exW or just having a life partner.
So my dilemma is the following:
I started dating and have met a few people I liked. I do feel that I'm very closed off emotionally. Usually when I meet someone I like we'll start dating, have lots of fun, but when I feel that the other person is expecting the relationship to get more serious I disengage immediately. I've actually been told by my dates that I don't let them love me(get close to me).
There was this one girl. We met about a year ago. I asked her out but she blew me off, well she stood me up 3 times in a row, so I shut that door. Recently she came around and we started going out. In a 2 month period we saw each other every weekend and we ended up being intimate. The thing is she said she wasn't into friends with benefits and that if we wanted to keep seeing each other we had to be in a serious relationship. I felt a little bit trapped and told her I wanted for us to know each other a little bit more. She basically said we knew each other enough and that being just friends would be pointless. So that friendship failed.
This last girl I really liked. The type of girl you feel a connection with. But that scares me now. That's what I felt with my exW when we met and eventually we ended up divorced. It's been 2 weeks since I last saw her and I'm feeling down. It's like I want to reach out and see her but when I realize I have to commit I start seeing all the red flags and uncertainty creeps in, so I've done my best to stay away.
So my questions are: Is it that I am closed off emotionally to any potential new partner? or Am I more critical of who I will share my emotions with because of the failure of my marriage? and for those of you that have more experience. Will I ever be able to love again and let myself be loved? How do you know when it's the right person(I thought my exW was)?
Thanks in advance.
Providence.
Put the internet to work for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment