On Tuesday evening, the 19 y/o sister of my youngest son's best friend was killed in a car accident. She was in the front seat, passenger side. The young man who was driving the car is 18. He is also one of my son's closest friends. He remains in critical condition, in a medically induced coma, with multiple broken bones and bleeding in his brain. Our family is very close to both of these families.
My heart is absolutely broken. The young lady was truly, truly beautiful, inside and out. If my heart is aching, I simply cannot fathom what is going on in the mind of her Mother and her two younger brothers. I so desperately want to find the right words to say, to bring some comfort, some peace, or maybe just a little less pain, but I can't find them. I'm afraid they simply don't exist. No matter what I think I might say, I try to imagine someone saying those words to me, if I had lost one of my own children. I've yet to think of anything that anyone could say or do that could possibly provide me with any measure of comfort.
My best friend's 20 y/o step-son died in a May, 2012, after a short battle with cancer. My friend never had children of her own and her step-son was her husband's only child. My friend says that her husband prays everyday that he will die. And, not a day goes by that he doesn't say how glad he is to be one day closer to seeing his son, again.
I just don't think that we are wired in such a way that we can ever "get over" or even "get through" the loss of our child. At best, I can only assume that anything short of taking your own life, after burying your son or daughter, would be considered a success.
Have any of you ever lost a child? Or known someone who has? It doesn't matter if your baby was 6 weeks old or 60 y/o. Your children are always your babies.
Can anyone offer me some great wisdom that I might offer to a friend who has just suffered the most unbearable loss imaginable?
My heart is absolutely broken. The young lady was truly, truly beautiful, inside and out. If my heart is aching, I simply cannot fathom what is going on in the mind of her Mother and her two younger brothers. I so desperately want to find the right words to say, to bring some comfort, some peace, or maybe just a little less pain, but I can't find them. I'm afraid they simply don't exist. No matter what I think I might say, I try to imagine someone saying those words to me, if I had lost one of my own children. I've yet to think of anything that anyone could say or do that could possibly provide me with any measure of comfort.
My best friend's 20 y/o step-son died in a May, 2012, after a short battle with cancer. My friend never had children of her own and her step-son was her husband's only child. My friend says that her husband prays everyday that he will die. And, not a day goes by that he doesn't say how glad he is to be one day closer to seeing his son, again.
I just don't think that we are wired in such a way that we can ever "get over" or even "get through" the loss of our child. At best, I can only assume that anything short of taking your own life, after burying your son or daughter, would be considered a success.
Have any of you ever lost a child? Or known someone who has? It doesn't matter if your baby was 6 weeks old or 60 y/o. Your children are always your babies.
Can anyone offer me some great wisdom that I might offer to a friend who has just suffered the most unbearable loss imaginable?
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