Back in 2009....August I met a man...We fell in love and we got married 5 weeks later in Sept....This was my first marriage...I always told myself I would only be married one time...The D-word isn't in my vocabulary....
I loved him with all my heart...and told him that I wanted to have children with him but not right away...his feeling were mutual...
November 2009 I was feeling a lot of stomach pain and got worse and weeks went by....Thanksgiving 1-2 am...I'm rolling around in bed...trying so hard to fight off the pain and it bringing tears to my eyes...He insisted that he take me to hospital....
He saved my life....My right ovarian tube had completely ruptured from having an ectopic pregnancy that I was unaware of...I was rushed into emergency surgery and lost my right tube and ovary....The doctor said I had been seeping blood internally for weeks and that it just completely broke apart...If I hadn't been rushed in that night I would have been gone in the morning....So I feel like I owe him my life....
2 weeks later... 12/12/09 and me still recovering from the surgery....My husband passed away from a horrific accident in our driveway....yes alcohol was a factor....
and yes there's a lot more to the story but dont want to go into detail....
His death struck me hard.....and on his death date on 2010 2011 2012...I would go to the last place I seen him alive....yes the bar....and play his favorite song on the jukebox and then leave a yellow rose by the tree he passed at.....
My current husband now got so upset with me last year about going to the bar to play the last husbands song and yes last year he went with me there and acted all depressed and hurt...and we were not married yet... so this year I had planned not to go to that bar and play the song....that I would just leave the rose by the tree.....and I let him know I was going to do this and he seemed to get upset with me just doing that.....
and he even brought our newborn daughter into the situation...saying "what am I suppose to tell her when she asks why mommy is putting a rose there" I said "the truth...its for remembering a loved one..."
All I can do is Thank my first husband for the joy and time I did have with him and for saving my life....
And I really felt like my first husband pushed me to be with my current husband through a series of coincidence....and my now husband is upset that i feel that way....Cuz without my first husband I don't think I would have been with my now husband....
So he makes me feel bad for wanting to remember him one day out of the year....
And All I can really say to him is what is something were to happen to me....would you remember me, or would you forget me like you want me to do with him? Wouldn't you want me to remember you if you were to pass?
and he says stuff like He feels like I put him on a pedestal....and I don't see how i do that....Its not like i have any pictures of him on my walls...I don't dwell on the past and think what if...what if constantly....(i did before meeting my current husband), but now all I have become thankful for it....
He makes me feel guilty for wanting to remember this man...
I loved him with all my heart...and told him that I wanted to have children with him but not right away...his feeling were mutual...
November 2009 I was feeling a lot of stomach pain and got worse and weeks went by....Thanksgiving 1-2 am...I'm rolling around in bed...trying so hard to fight off the pain and it bringing tears to my eyes...He insisted that he take me to hospital....
He saved my life....My right ovarian tube had completely ruptured from having an ectopic pregnancy that I was unaware of...I was rushed into emergency surgery and lost my right tube and ovary....The doctor said I had been seeping blood internally for weeks and that it just completely broke apart...If I hadn't been rushed in that night I would have been gone in the morning....So I feel like I owe him my life....
2 weeks later... 12/12/09 and me still recovering from the surgery....My husband passed away from a horrific accident in our driveway....yes alcohol was a factor....
and yes there's a lot more to the story but dont want to go into detail....
His death struck me hard.....and on his death date on 2010 2011 2012...I would go to the last place I seen him alive....yes the bar....and play his favorite song on the jukebox and then leave a yellow rose by the tree he passed at.....
My current husband now got so upset with me last year about going to the bar to play the last husbands song and yes last year he went with me there and acted all depressed and hurt...and we were not married yet... so this year I had planned not to go to that bar and play the song....that I would just leave the rose by the tree.....and I let him know I was going to do this and he seemed to get upset with me just doing that.....
and he even brought our newborn daughter into the situation...saying "what am I suppose to tell her when she asks why mommy is putting a rose there" I said "the truth...its for remembering a loved one..."
All I can do is Thank my first husband for the joy and time I did have with him and for saving my life....
And I really felt like my first husband pushed me to be with my current husband through a series of coincidence....and my now husband is upset that i feel that way....Cuz without my first husband I don't think I would have been with my now husband....
So he makes me feel bad for wanting to remember him one day out of the year....
And All I can really say to him is what is something were to happen to me....would you remember me, or would you forget me like you want me to do with him? Wouldn't you want me to remember you if you were to pass?
and he says stuff like He feels like I put him on a pedestal....and I don't see how i do that....Its not like i have any pictures of him on my walls...I don't dwell on the past and think what if...what if constantly....(i did before meeting my current husband), but now all I have become thankful for it....
He makes me feel guilty for wanting to remember this man...
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