I am recently separated..... talking about like 3 days since we have decided to separate...
My husband and I have been together for 5 years and have 3 kids together. In the summer he sat down and told me that he didn´t want to be with me anymore and I didn´t make him happy. We were both somewhat unhappy, he was very emotionally distant and I felt taken for granted most of the time. We were separated for many months but still lived together and slept in the same room for many months because we didn´t know how to deal with everything and didn´t know how to talk to the kids.
after many months of a tough situation we decided that he had to leave and that we needed time to clear our heads and think about what we wanted. At the time I thought different things, I was heart broken because he was leaving and very pissed off that he had all the time in the world to think while I had to put on a happy face all day in front of the kids and have no time to think myself...
He left for only a week and he asked to come home. He missed all of us and wanted to be a family. I was very happy that day but had my suspicions from the beginning that he had come back because he felt lonely and couldn´t be without the kids. Well I thought that things would slowly get better and we would make time for our marriage not just work and the kids.
but 2 months have passed and things are the same. He is just as distant, no interest in doing things as a couple, I receive no attention and fell just as taking for granted and generally just as unloved as ever. So...i waited hoping things would get better.. but 3 days ago I decided to take the bull by the horns and just talk....
Well it was a really long conversation but ultimately he has no illusion to be with me but he still loves me and says that he is in love with me (thing that I can´t quite believe because if you are in love with someone you would have the illusion and interest the other person). We have never really fought and we are friends (which makes it a lot harder). We have decided that the best thing for us is to separate considering that we are not really happy and don´t know how to make things better.
I am really just looking for people to tell me their experiences and how to get though all this.... it is really hard to lose the most important thing in your life (apart form the kids of course) and fell like your heart breaks a little more with every second that passes.... need advice please...
My husband and I have been together for 5 years and have 3 kids together. In the summer he sat down and told me that he didn´t want to be with me anymore and I didn´t make him happy. We were both somewhat unhappy, he was very emotionally distant and I felt taken for granted most of the time. We were separated for many months but still lived together and slept in the same room for many months because we didn´t know how to deal with everything and didn´t know how to talk to the kids.
after many months of a tough situation we decided that he had to leave and that we needed time to clear our heads and think about what we wanted. At the time I thought different things, I was heart broken because he was leaving and very pissed off that he had all the time in the world to think while I had to put on a happy face all day in front of the kids and have no time to think myself...
He left for only a week and he asked to come home. He missed all of us and wanted to be a family. I was very happy that day but had my suspicions from the beginning that he had come back because he felt lonely and couldn´t be without the kids. Well I thought that things would slowly get better and we would make time for our marriage not just work and the kids.
but 2 months have passed and things are the same. He is just as distant, no interest in doing things as a couple, I receive no attention and fell just as taking for granted and generally just as unloved as ever. So...i waited hoping things would get better.. but 3 days ago I decided to take the bull by the horns and just talk....
Well it was a really long conversation but ultimately he has no illusion to be with me but he still loves me and says that he is in love with me (thing that I can´t quite believe because if you are in love with someone you would have the illusion and interest the other person). We have never really fought and we are friends (which makes it a lot harder). We have decided that the best thing for us is to separate considering that we are not really happy and don´t know how to make things better.
I am really just looking for people to tell me their experiences and how to get though all this.... it is really hard to lose the most important thing in your life (apart form the kids of course) and fell like your heart breaks a little more with every second that passes.... need advice please...
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