Infidelity and Respect (long, please bear with me!)

My husband and I have been married almost 3 months, together almost 3 years. When we first met things were great, or sex life amazing, he was a great father, and I was the kind of girl who would do anything for her man, always eager to please. We both made some mistakes : I went out to a bar with a friend and lied to him about it - he flirted with girls online and sent inappropriate texts to his baby mama. These things are bad, but not enough that we couldn't get through them. Things started to go bad (for me) when I realized he wasn't willing to put in as much effort. I did everything I could to make up for my mistakes, no matter how ridiculous I thought his demands were. But when it says his turn, he wasn't willing to do anything I asked. According to him, loving me and respecting me should have been enough to win back my trust and forgiveness. Imagine my surprise, after everything he had put me through, everything I did WILLINGLY to make up for my mistakes and he wasn't willing to do anything except treat me better. That was when my resentment started. True to his word, he did treat me better. I treated him like **** for a year, arguing about the things I needed to trust him again. The only reason I stayed with him was because he stayed through that. After about a year I finally got what I wanted and things got better - kind of. I had decided not to be a door mat anymore, and I wasn't going to break my back doing everythin for him if he wasn't willing to do so for me. I started treating him better, and even though he still complained I was rude and disrespectful, things were still okay. So we got married. We felt we were in a good place, and on the same page. We loved each other, so why not? A couple weeks before he had done second thoughts - I thought it was normal cold feet, but I let him know if he postponed the wedding it would probably do irreparable damage to our relationship. Not a threat, just a fact. He chose to go through with it. After the wedding this went down hill. His lost his sex drive for a while and put about 4000 dollars of work into his car, instead of 2000 towards the car and 2000 to savings for our house like we had talked about. I recently found out that weeks before our wedding, he was having a CA, some girl who sent him a bunch of naked pictures, he led her on but nothing physical. Supposedly this time, he was willing to do anything, but now he says that things would be 1000% better if I respected him. The problem is, I don't think he deserves it. After what he did with that girl, and he hasn't put our marriage or future first before anything.. He thinks he deserves respect no matter what and if I was a decent person it would be easy for me. Is he right? Or does he have to earn the respect back, like I think? If I'm right, how do I get him to see that? Posted via Mobile Device

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