I need help ASAP, I feel myself going under

Dated: 1 1/2 years Married: 8 1/2 years No children together Both children from previous marriages Divorced since Sept of 2012 We always had a rocky marriage. I am his 3rd marriage (red flag). I will try to be short but to the point. His child was always in trouble with the law and very disrespectful to me. This put a lot of pressure on our relationship. He is an alcoholic and has used different drugs. He has always loved to stay in bars and run with different women. That is why I divorced him. Since the divorce he has texted, came to my house, left pictures on my car during the night. We started to see one another on a regular basis and he promised him new what he had lost and would do everything in his power to correct all his mistakes. Come to find out while he was talking and seeing me, I found out that he was talking and seeing another girl. I am hurt, torn, can't eat, and can't sleep. I feel myself going down and cannot seem to pull out. I go to bed thinking of this and get up thinking of what he has done again and I allowed it to happen. I found out the girl he was talking to had a boyfriend of 6 years and I exposed the relationship to the boyfriend. The boyfriend is heartbroken as well. What is so crazy, I'm trying to help the boyfriend and I am in worse shape than he is. At least he can function. Recently I have tried to date other people and I am miserable once I'm with another person.So I just stopped all together. I do not do anything but go to work. My ex is a narcissist and he knew just want to do to make you feel special when he desired to. I miss the good moments with him. We did everything together. He was out of work for 4 1/2 years for back injuries and he had a lot of time to play while I was at work. I can't stand the thoughts of losing him for good to another women. I want what she is getting all the attention and love from him. I know this sounds like I'm a crazy person for loving someone so bad. I try to tell my heart and mind, but it is not working. How can a man say he loves you and then turns around and trying to sleep and see another women? There is so much in my head I can not think straight. I feel myself slipping away. I want this pain to go away. I have lost 6 pounds in one week. I get sick with the thoughts of food right now. What I hate he walks around happy as can be while I'm left with all the heartache. I have really tried to keep this marriage and I failed. Please Help!:(

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