| I don't know what to do with these feelings. I am normally a positive person and can find the good in almost everything. WH is doing almost everything right---he would rather rug sweep and is reluctant to not do so. But when I ask, I do so firmly and unemotionally, so he complies. He is being sweet, complimentary, wanting reassurance about us not getting a divorce, asking for help in re engaging in our marriage---all good stuff. So why, when I see that it's him calling on my cell phone, do I not want to answer it? Why do I look at his picture and want to make obscene gestures at it? Why can I not put my wedding rings back on without feeling sick? I know I don't trust him. I think I'm actually ok with that. I guess I don't respect him either. I don't know how to give that respect back to him. I don't want to see him or talk to him or breathe his air right now. I love him, I really do. I want things to work out, but right now, I almost feel like I hate him. How long will I hurt and feel like this? | |||
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Feeling almost constant contempt and mistrust
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