breaking point

New here and just hoping for some advice. Been married for over 8 years and have about decided to throw in the towel. Husband hasn't had a job in several years - says he is looking but never offers where he has applied – never once seen an email for online applications. He stays up all night and sleeps all day - I work full time+ and still have to do all the chores in the morning and at lunch(we have small farm - goats/cows etc) he does do the late PM chores. About once a week he will clean the house - but that is it. We are in a LOT of debt due to only one income for so long. The last straw for me was last week he was supposed to go do some general labor work for a lady and he said he drove all the way out there and there was no one home. But then I checked the email the next day (I rarely check this email account) and she had emailed saying she'd waited on him all day and why didn't he show up. Of course he lied and said she wasn't there!!!!! He is hateful and lazy and I just can't handle it anymore. I took my vows very seriously but I just can't imagine spending the rest of my life like this. I've begged, cried, screamed and now I honestly have no feeling left - I'm just numb about everything. And he is very good during every argument at turning everything to being my fault so I start thinking I'm a terrible person. I think the only reason I am torn is that we've been together a long time and while I am not IN love with him anymore I do care about him and hate to see him struggle by himself – but I don't think that is a reason to stay married. Is it soo much to ask that your spouse help with work around the house and bills! He gets very angry very easily and has threatened a lot of scary stuff and the day I thought please just do it and put me out of misery I realized I was not in a good place……………………… Any advice??

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