Ok, my issue is that I can't have a relationship. I'm not talking just about girlfriends, I'm talking about normal friendships aswell. Its quite odd; I can get along with people and don't have major issues with small talk. Also, whilst my self-confidence isn't that great, its not that bad either. However, the key problem is that I can never, without exception, be totally at ease with someone. Admittedly to a much lesser degree, this is even true (to a certain extent) with family. Anyway, it means that I cannot make friends; I am polite and can make acquaintances no problem, but any relationship even marginally deeper than casual associate is just not possible for me. For how can you be a friend, or partner, of someone who is always reserved? Who cannot be open and relaxed with you? Of course you can't. It rubs off on people and leads to awkwardness; its not a brilliant state of affairs I know. Most of the time I can cope with my lack of friends; I am most definitely an introvert, but sometimes I get truly crushing loneliness. Its certainly an unpleasant sensation, I kind of feel both terribly restless and immensely weary all at once.
Well, my questions are these: does anyone else have this problem? Or can relate to it in someway? Also, did you ever get over it? Any thoughts would be welcome as I'm pretty low at the moment. As a point of interest, I don't have autism, personality disorders, trust issues etc, which you'd easily be forgiven for assuming. Its just that I cannot have relationships apart from those of the most shallow kind, due to my sheer inability of being in any sense at ease with people. Its not that I don't want to; God knows I couldn't think of anything I would rather like than some close friends, or even a girlfriend perhaps. The basic problem is, and at the risk of sounding dramatic, that I simply can't.
Well, my questions are these: does anyone else have this problem? Or can relate to it in someway? Also, did you ever get over it? Any thoughts would be welcome as I'm pretty low at the moment. As a point of interest, I don't have autism, personality disorders, trust issues etc, which you'd easily be forgiven for assuming. Its just that I cannot have relationships apart from those of the most shallow kind, due to my sheer inability of being in any sense at ease with people. Its not that I don't want to; God knows I couldn't think of anything I would rather like than some close friends, or even a girlfriend perhaps. The basic problem is, and at the risk of sounding dramatic, that I simply can't.
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