I literally suck at everything. I'm not really talented in anything at all. I've tried art, singing, dancing,writing, but I'm always just mediocre at best. I had good A-Levels and have a languages degree from a respectable university, which I am proud of, but still I don't feel like I'm very intelligent at all.
I don't know a lot about politics, finance etc. and could never have serious discussions on the subjects. I can't cook very well or stuff like that, I think I have nothing insightful to say, and I can't impress anybody.
I've been studying my language for about 12 years now and have lived in the country in the past (and live here again now with my partner, been here for a few months) but I am still nowhere near to being fluent. I can write ok in the language but I have no confidence at all speaking it.
I just freeze and become so shy, I think my voice sounds weird, I cannot pronounce 'r's properly and I've been told I sound like a baby when I speak the language. I have problems with fluency and I just can't think on the spot of verb conjugasions and such. It's embarrassing when natives see my level despite having a degree in it and living here.
My partner is a native of this country, and it's hard when we go out with his friends, because they have big discussions which I can't really join in, because I have to spend my time trying to understand what they're saying. I can come up with a few questions and responses here and there, but nowhere near what I could have said in English.
They are mainly nice and understanding, and some of them have complimented my skills, but I still feel so shy and I worry they'll misinterpret it as stand-offish.
I don't have any friends here; I've found that people start to ignore me after a bit, and my language skills aren't good enough as I said. It also limits my job prospects.
It's going to sound very shallow and self-absorbed, but I really wish someone would tell me i'm pretty or beautiful. Every time I go on facebook,I see girls with so many comments about how beautiful and gorgeous etc. they are, but not one person ever says it; friends, family, etc. Boyfriend and his family have which is very nice, but othewise, virtually never. It makes me feel inadequate and ugly.
My boyfriend had a female friend when he was younger and they're planning to meet up soon. I'd never stop him having his friends but it's making me worried. He has said in the past she's very intelligent and cool. She seems to be very popular with great style and effortlessly cool, and exactly his type physically.
I just can't see why he would prefer me over her, and I'm so scared they'll get close and realise they want to be together. I'm dumb and stupid and he says this, usually in a jokey way, but sometimes he gets annoyed.
He jokes about my lack of skills and stuff but it's true; I bring nothing new or interesting to the relationship. We also argue quite often.
I try to read articles and stuff, and talk about it, and we do have a lot in common, but I just feel like I don't fit in with him and his friends' style, but this new girl exactly does.
Please help, I probably sound like a moaning idiot, first world problems etc. Because I am very lucky to have who and what I have.
But I have no self-esteem whatsoever. I think about suicide but I know people care and I couldn't ever do it to them. I'd be so grateful for anything at all, thank you.
I don't know a lot about politics, finance etc. and could never have serious discussions on the subjects. I can't cook very well or stuff like that, I think I have nothing insightful to say, and I can't impress anybody.
I've been studying my language for about 12 years now and have lived in the country in the past (and live here again now with my partner, been here for a few months) but I am still nowhere near to being fluent. I can write ok in the language but I have no confidence at all speaking it.
I just freeze and become so shy, I think my voice sounds weird, I cannot pronounce 'r's properly and I've been told I sound like a baby when I speak the language. I have problems with fluency and I just can't think on the spot of verb conjugasions and such. It's embarrassing when natives see my level despite having a degree in it and living here.
My partner is a native of this country, and it's hard when we go out with his friends, because they have big discussions which I can't really join in, because I have to spend my time trying to understand what they're saying. I can come up with a few questions and responses here and there, but nowhere near what I could have said in English.
They are mainly nice and understanding, and some of them have complimented my skills, but I still feel so shy and I worry they'll misinterpret it as stand-offish.
I don't have any friends here; I've found that people start to ignore me after a bit, and my language skills aren't good enough as I said. It also limits my job prospects.
It's going to sound very shallow and self-absorbed, but I really wish someone would tell me i'm pretty or beautiful. Every time I go on facebook,I see girls with so many comments about how beautiful and gorgeous etc. they are, but not one person ever says it; friends, family, etc. Boyfriend and his family have which is very nice, but othewise, virtually never. It makes me feel inadequate and ugly.
My boyfriend had a female friend when he was younger and they're planning to meet up soon. I'd never stop him having his friends but it's making me worried. He has said in the past she's very intelligent and cool. She seems to be very popular with great style and effortlessly cool, and exactly his type physically.
I just can't see why he would prefer me over her, and I'm so scared they'll get close and realise they want to be together. I'm dumb and stupid and he says this, usually in a jokey way, but sometimes he gets annoyed.
He jokes about my lack of skills and stuff but it's true; I bring nothing new or interesting to the relationship. We also argue quite often.
I try to read articles and stuff, and talk about it, and we do have a lot in common, but I just feel like I don't fit in with him and his friends' style, but this new girl exactly does.
Please help, I probably sound like a moaning idiot, first world problems etc. Because I am very lucky to have who and what I have.
But I have no self-esteem whatsoever. I think about suicide but I know people care and I couldn't ever do it to them. I'd be so grateful for anything at all, thank you.
Put the internet to work for you.
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