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Feeling lonely and low on friends, tips on making me happier/improving myself?

Hi :)

I'm off from uni at the moment (I'm 20), and I don't have any friends at the moment, so feeling kind of unhappy/lonely. I've always struggled to make friends (haven't made any at uni), and I want to use these holidays to do something proactive.

I'm doing volunteer work (couple of different ones), and trying out a variety of different types of volunteer work. Enjoy this, feels like I'm doing something and it feels good that I'm meeting new people and potentially unfamiliar challenges. I applied for jobs this summer too, but haven't got a job unfortunately. I'm still trying to apply though.

I'm doing exercise too over the summer, make myself feel a bit better and stay fit, and I try and play as much badminton, tennis as I can with my relatives. Though I have trouble finding people to play with, so I'm not playing as much as I'd like to or at uni where there are more social sessions and clubs around where you can play. Got my guitar too, trying to get better at that and reading a bit more and trying to learn a language. Though these things particularly things involved doing on my own, I'm losing motivation to do these days.


I find it pretty hard to make friends with others, it's difficult for me, dunno how people do it so easily. I do get kind of anxious in social situations quite a bit, my mind often blanks and it's difficult to think what to say or my throat closes up, which sucks it gets rather depressing. I have a picture in my mind who I want to be when I go up talking to people/fellow students and I'm confident in my ability to converse and make jokes when I'm relaxed/at home, but often in those situations it doesn't go to plan, my mind empties and it's hard to think of what to say, or that joke. It's also very hard to appear and feel natural and relaxed in that state too.

I wonder if there's any tips on approaching people and coming across better with people. I'm generally always smiling, and people don't seem to dislike me but I've been thinking maybe it's my body language or tone of voice that's bad, it's hard to really make that connection with them and for them to warm up to me. I've asked relatives about it, but they say there's nothing wrong with it, but of course they might be biased. So I'm tried to work out what I can do about that.

So yeah, I'd appreciate any advice or tips/ideas I can get to improve myself or generally just feel a bit happier these holidays.

Thanks




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