Feeling really hurt by wife's comments

Hi, I'm here to seek some impartial advice. I'm married 25 years and the one relatively constant source of angst in my marriage over the last ~15 years is that we have mismatched libidos. We've been to counselling on that topic, but it was a very uncomfortable topic. My wife has the lower libido. She didn't always, but her interest in sex disappeared for about 18 months after the birth of our first child and everything has been different in the years since. She suffered from post natal depression back then but we all worked our way through it and everything slowly got back to what has become our new normal, I guess. Things improved for a little while, after I had a vasectomy, something that came up as an idea during counselling. I revealed some personal issues during counselling, that I regret now, because my wife jokes about them with her friends. I felt very humbled recently while on a date with my wife to find her and her best friend teasing me about the size of my manhood. We were in our local bar on a busy night, surrounded by regular pals, and I was mortified. I feel so lonely right now. I've been online and identified some pills that I could buy that say they help make you bigger down there, but I dread the thought that if she ever told anyone that I'd bought these pills, I just don't know what I would do. Anyway, to try to cut a long story short, my wife has a large circle of friends to which she dedicates increasing amounts of her time on Facebook. She appears to share an intimacy with hundreds of FB friends that she doesn't share with me. She is very good looking but very vain and she likes to feign intimacy with others on FB (lots of love hearts and kisses in her responses to people she hardly knows and stuff like that), and she loves to boast. I find some of it to be a little embarrassing and I've found myself backing away from trying to negotiate with her about her behaviour because I started to feel like She was treating me like her father rather than her husband. While her FB flirting has brought her to dizzy new heights of awareness in our community, I've found that my circle of friends has just gotten smaller and smaller. I feel very isolated and alone, and I dare not talk to anyone. Does anyone have any advice? I think I'm going to buy the pills and just not tell her because I fear it could be just another excuse, like the vasectomy thing, and things might improve for a while and then drop back to where we are now again. Just for clarity, we enjoy sex maybe 4 to 6 times per year and it always feels like she's doing it for my benefit. I've never been with anyone else, so maybe I'm just not any good at it. Success for me would be feeling intimate with my wife again, regardless of whether or not we have sex. It's the loneliness that hurts most. Thanks, Irish

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