Wife says marriage is over but won't leave, won't file

My wife told me about a year and a half ago that she ilybinilwy. I suspected an on and off again affair, that was just about confirmed although I have no proof, it's a long story but through all this she has vacillated and cake eaten and half heartedly worked on our marriage. My point would be that she could never have worked on it while having an affair at the same time, she probably tried to end it once when I told her too, then probably backslid into it, the point is this is jacked up because I got no real proof. So finally she asked for a divorce and is just taking her time moving out although she has threatened this before and now is threatening it again, without actually doing it. I'm so fed up at this time I've filed for divorce. She seemed legitimately scared by this, ceased looking for apartments and has tried to talk to me more than I try to talk to her but I've shut down and will not talk to her more than required. I'd rather of worked on our marriage but she was unwilling so now I'm just going to proceed on with a divorce and I have no idea if it'll wake her up or not but at this point I'm tired of this fence sitting and would rather be divorced and have her gone and begin healing than live in limbo land forever. She's not got the resouces to live on her own in any shape or form like she's accustomed to and she's starting to realize this. I feel that sooner or later she's going to cave and try and reconcile. My answer to this would be no, the only thing I'll accept is a firm committment to work on the marriage, counseling etc and the divorce proceeds along all the while and I'll determine if I want to stop it or not. My real point is asking people on here if I'm on the right track, it seems to me I need to stop waiting around on her and take some control over the timeline and the situation her, if nothing else for my own sanity and that of my kids too. Living together like this is horrible, she's in another bedroom, she's got stuff stacked in there in a mess and she's just reduced to asking me about laundry times. I don't talk to her about anything unless she talks first, and then I keep it very short. Just wondering if there's any suggestions or if I'm on the right track, thanks so much for your time and consideration.

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