Lurking on the forums for a while and need more information. See my question below (last sentence).
My story. I'm 48 and have been married for 21 years, most happily, but we've had our more than fair share of issues over the years.
We have 3 kids, 2 of whom are in college, with one home (3 years until she enters college).
For the first 10 years of marriage - we had an awesome sex life - but it was at the expense of her borderline personality disorder and being at the receiving end of her mood swings. She was never officially diagnosed - as she refused to seek any counseling, but based on my research and understanding of the disorder, she fit many of the criteria. The "I hate you - don't leave me" disorder.... I was walking on egg shells all the time.
Things changed about 11 years ago when I had had it and was out the door. She agreed to see a doctor ... Which she did and she was put on a daily low dose of Prozac. No longer walking on egg shells after a month.
The downside - killed her labido. From 2-4 times per week to once a week to now, once every 2 months (if I'm lucky). She won't even snuggle.
So - I've been reading on the forum about how women need to aroused to feel desire to have sex.
On occasion, when somehow a risqué movie came on a premium channel - I did notice that she did respond. I would like to try this again, but actually deciding to put such a movie on for either of us is awkward. Plus - I was always of the thinking that desire first than arousal. Mind you- she doesn't like talking about this (I would and do).
So - my question - how do you feel about soft porn (or any porn for that matter) to arouse you? Does it work?
My story. I'm 48 and have been married for 21 years, most happily, but we've had our more than fair share of issues over the years.
We have 3 kids, 2 of whom are in college, with one home (3 years until she enters college).
For the first 10 years of marriage - we had an awesome sex life - but it was at the expense of her borderline personality disorder and being at the receiving end of her mood swings. She was never officially diagnosed - as she refused to seek any counseling, but based on my research and understanding of the disorder, she fit many of the criteria. The "I hate you - don't leave me" disorder.... I was walking on egg shells all the time.
Things changed about 11 years ago when I had had it and was out the door. She agreed to see a doctor ... Which she did and she was put on a daily low dose of Prozac. No longer walking on egg shells after a month.
The downside - killed her labido. From 2-4 times per week to once a week to now, once every 2 months (if I'm lucky). She won't even snuggle.
So - I've been reading on the forum about how women need to aroused to feel desire to have sex.
On occasion, when somehow a risqué movie came on a premium channel - I did notice that she did respond. I would like to try this again, but actually deciding to put such a movie on for either of us is awkward. Plus - I was always of the thinking that desire first than arousal. Mind you- she doesn't like talking about this (I would and do).
So - my question - how do you feel about soft porn (or any porn for that matter) to arouse you? Does it work?
Put the internet to work for you.
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