I'm in love with my husband. We've been married 13 years. We're best friends, always have been, and we connect deeply in ways I can't explain. We've never once questioned whether or not we were meant to be together.
When it comes to our sex life, I really don't know what to call it. I mean, it's fantastic, but difficult. Let me explain.
We have sex 7 days a week, at least twice a day. He watches porn 98% of the time during sex. If I'm on my monthly "thing," I still have to do oral or allow him to do something else to me. If I'm not in the mood he'll settle for the just-lie-there type of sex. He wants me when he's sick, when I'm sick, when I'm tired, busy, when the kids are awake or asleep, any time of day or night. And it's important to note that he doesn't believe in quickies (in his own words). He's a satisfy-you kind of man and will go for 30 minutes or more each session. He's HD, and I guess I'm LD (I could go a month without sex and be fine), but we make it work.
I realize he has a sexual desire that needs fulfilling, and as his wife, I believe it's my job to fulfill it. We have amazing sex all the time, and other times it's a little drab, but he's happy either way. That's all that matters. Except now I'm stuck.
I'M SICK OF HAVING SEX!!!!
I don't know what to do anymore. The thought of being sexual makes me want to cry sometimes. He makes me climax pretty easily, but I just don't want to climax EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. But, he loves it. We've come up with compromises (i.e. no penetration, but other things), but now the compromises are wearing me down. I'm so far in with keeping him sex happy that I have no idea what would happen if I stopped. I don't think it would kill our relationship, but it would certainly give it a good jolt.
I've talked to him about it. He knows how I feel. One time his argument was I didn't have to do anything but lay there. My response to that was it takes a lot of energy to look and act like I'm in the mood, especially when I'm at a point where touch is excruciatingly uncomfortable. If I really did do nothing, our sex life would not be as good.
I look at him as needing something that only I can give him. I don't want to be the bad guy. It hurts me to tell him no. But sometimes I just want to be normal. I'm so sick of the moaning and groaning atmosphere. It takes up every free minute I'm ever given. I just don't want to think about sex anymore. At least not for a while.
I need advice on how I can ask for a break. A loooong break. He's good about giving me short breaks, like a day or two here and there, but that's of just penetration. He's still gonna do something, and I still have to be "her." Still, I'm never given enough time in-between to even want to have sex, but I'm always willing. I've really messed up. I was accused of being a bait and switcher in my last post a couple years ago, which I thought was totally unfair. I mean, I'm just doing what I know I have to do to satisfy my husband. But what can I do to get a break without him getting salty with me?
When it comes to our sex life, I really don't know what to call it. I mean, it's fantastic, but difficult. Let me explain.
We have sex 7 days a week, at least twice a day. He watches porn 98% of the time during sex. If I'm on my monthly "thing," I still have to do oral or allow him to do something else to me. If I'm not in the mood he'll settle for the just-lie-there type of sex. He wants me when he's sick, when I'm sick, when I'm tired, busy, when the kids are awake or asleep, any time of day or night. And it's important to note that he doesn't believe in quickies (in his own words). He's a satisfy-you kind of man and will go for 30 minutes or more each session. He's HD, and I guess I'm LD (I could go a month without sex and be fine), but we make it work.
I realize he has a sexual desire that needs fulfilling, and as his wife, I believe it's my job to fulfill it. We have amazing sex all the time, and other times it's a little drab, but he's happy either way. That's all that matters. Except now I'm stuck.
I'M SICK OF HAVING SEX!!!!
I don't know what to do anymore. The thought of being sexual makes me want to cry sometimes. He makes me climax pretty easily, but I just don't want to climax EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. But, he loves it. We've come up with compromises (i.e. no penetration, but other things), but now the compromises are wearing me down. I'm so far in with keeping him sex happy that I have no idea what would happen if I stopped. I don't think it would kill our relationship, but it would certainly give it a good jolt.
I've talked to him about it. He knows how I feel. One time his argument was I didn't have to do anything but lay there. My response to that was it takes a lot of energy to look and act like I'm in the mood, especially when I'm at a point where touch is excruciatingly uncomfortable. If I really did do nothing, our sex life would not be as good.
I look at him as needing something that only I can give him. I don't want to be the bad guy. It hurts me to tell him no. But sometimes I just want to be normal. I'm so sick of the moaning and groaning atmosphere. It takes up every free minute I'm ever given. I just don't want to think about sex anymore. At least not for a while.
I need advice on how I can ask for a break. A loooong break. He's good about giving me short breaks, like a day or two here and there, but that's of just penetration. He's still gonna do something, and I still have to be "her." Still, I'm never given enough time in-between to even want to have sex, but I'm always willing. I've really messed up. I was accused of being a bait and switcher in my last post a couple years ago, which I thought was totally unfair. I mean, I'm just doing what I know I have to do to satisfy my husband. But what can I do to get a break without him getting salty with me?
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