As a man who has been married for 20+ years; I have come to believe it's not just about the lack of sex, but the lack of affection.
I truly feel as if my wife isn't attracted to me anymore and therefore she barely shows any affection toward me. Since she doesn't seem interested in me then I have performance issues in the bedroom. it never used to be this way for me but for the last couple of years our lovemaking has been almost scheduled. Only on a Saturday or Sunday and only after we have both showered. now lately it has been about once every 3-4 weeks. Still sticking to the Sat/Sun schedule.
Now each week she showers first and relaxes in just her robe until I get in the shower then she is dressed and ready to start her day by the time I get out of shower. It doesn't matter if i wait an hour after her shower, she will stay naked in the bedroom in just a robe usually open, or if I go within minutes after hers. By the way my showers usually last about 6 minutes.
If I try to initiate sex before she or I showers then the game is off til next week. If I question why she doesn't seem to want me then she gets mad and says I don't respect her feelings.
I just can't win. even if I just want to spend some alone time with her and cuddle or watch TV she tells me how tired she is and shoos me from the room. but stays up for a couple of hours more watching TV or playing games on her tablet.
And before anyone asks NO she is not having any sort of affair. She has no time. She works full time and is currently going to school online for her masters degree. Any free time lately is spent hanging with her best friend (female and my sister) or we do things with family for the day. But very rarely is it ever just her and I.
I think I could even live without the sex if I had to but this feeling like she just doesn't desire me hurts more than ever.
I am tired of waking up and feeling dead inside.
I feel like we are roommates. That is all.
I truly feel as if my wife isn't attracted to me anymore and therefore she barely shows any affection toward me. Since she doesn't seem interested in me then I have performance issues in the bedroom. it never used to be this way for me but for the last couple of years our lovemaking has been almost scheduled. Only on a Saturday or Sunday and only after we have both showered. now lately it has been about once every 3-4 weeks. Still sticking to the Sat/Sun schedule.
Now each week she showers first and relaxes in just her robe until I get in the shower then she is dressed and ready to start her day by the time I get out of shower. It doesn't matter if i wait an hour after her shower, she will stay naked in the bedroom in just a robe usually open, or if I go within minutes after hers. By the way my showers usually last about 6 minutes.
If I try to initiate sex before she or I showers then the game is off til next week. If I question why she doesn't seem to want me then she gets mad and says I don't respect her feelings.
I just can't win. even if I just want to spend some alone time with her and cuddle or watch TV she tells me how tired she is and shoos me from the room. but stays up for a couple of hours more watching TV or playing games on her tablet.
And before anyone asks NO she is not having any sort of affair. She has no time. She works full time and is currently going to school online for her masters degree. Any free time lately is spent hanging with her best friend (female and my sister) or we do things with family for the day. But very rarely is it ever just her and I.
I think I could even live without the sex if I had to but this feeling like she just doesn't desire me hurts more than ever.
I am tired of waking up and feeling dead inside.
I feel like we are roommates. That is all.
Put the internet to work for you.
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